The most important thing I realized is that painful breakups, unrequited love, shitty jobs and the like help us to BUILD CHARACTER and that no matter how bad it feels, we are much better off because of it. Sometimes you have to stand alone to make sure you can. Forget what you want to remember what you deserve.You may not end up where you thought you'd be, but you'll always end up where you were meant to be. You can either let these bad things, define you, destroy you or strengthen you. Fight through it like a warrior. Greater things are to come.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011


That's a dream come true for someone right there.
There's GOTTA be at LEAST 270 chicken nuggets in there.

Now someone make it happen FOR ME!!!!!

Hey cousin, guess what?

i love you. thats all.
now lets go do some work LOL.

Monday, August 29, 2011



I usually don't rant about football on this blog but i really need to get it off of my chest.

As some of you may have already known. Today Arsenal suffered their worst defeat in 115 years. Absolute devastation. I thought last season's defeat was bad when i started to cry at the pub. Nah, that was nothing compared to how we were pulverized today. Our reserves team slaughtered by wolves. Civil war between fans. Injuries, Bans, Bookings. This is a new low for us. The goals that we conceded definitely felt like stabs. The pain was so bad, I couldn't even bring myself to cry. Instead I just laughed. And drank (of course).

No judging now.

I still love Arsenal to death tho.

Just thought l'd share.

Back to work i go.

Saturday, August 27, 2011


Dream proposal.

I HAD to make a blog post out of this because this will essentially be my future fiancee's "HOW-TO-PROPOSE" to me visual guide. Remember, its all about being CREATIVE future mister. Also a reminder to myself that i deserve that, fairytale ending and i shouldn't settle for less.


People. KILLS ME. rofl.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

is this life?

i certainly hope not. im becoming mean & more frustrated as the days fly pass me.

the lack of inspiration is starting to scare me. im losing sight of what i want to do and what i need to do to get there. the most concerning part is im losing myself and i feel myself giving up that fight slowly. Day by day, bit by bit.


came back from camping this weekend with ONLY two mosquito bites, massive pounds gained and am now a pro at flipcup. i returned to a messy room, my brother being difficult and a pile of freelance work.

i may be doing a lot of freelance work but 90% of that work is extremely mindless and doesn't inspire me in any way. its mainly for income. To me its no different from data entry.

what has life become?


omfg. old indeed.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

eerily accurate

Note: This dream was EXTREMELY sci-fi and weird.

This 3rd dimension (perhaps aliens) were abducting dolphins and turning them into helium balloons as they are being teleport up into the skies.

To see a dolphin in your dream, symbolizes spiritual guidance, intellect, mental attributes and emotional trust. The dream is usually an inspirational one, encouraging you to utilize your mind to its capacity and move upward in life.

To see balloons in your dream, indicate declining hopes and disappointments in your search for love. A situation in your life will take a turn downward.

To see an ascending balloon in your dream, signifies frustrating conditions in your life in which you are seeking to rise above. You are expressing a desire to escape.

Aside from the freaky dolphin teleporting thing, there were also extremely pretty stars/constellations and fireworks in the sky.

To see stars in your dream, symbolize excellence, success, aspirations or high ideals. You are putting some decision in the hands of fate and luck. Perhaps you are being too "starry-eyed" or idealistic.

To see fireworks in your dream, symbolizes enthusiasm, creativity, and talent. It may also indicate that you are showing off and making a spectacle of yourself. Alternatively, fireworks represents release of some pent up or repressed feelings

So while all this was happening, i was trying SO hard to take a picture of all this but its either im unable to snap it or it comes out blurry.

To dream that you are taking a picture, suggests that you need to focus more attention to some situation or relationship. Perhaps, you feel that you need to recapture some past moments in a relationship. Alternatively, taking a picture refers to your desires to hold onto a certain moment in your life.

To see a blurry picture in your dream, suggests that your memory of the depicted event, incident, or people, is fading. Perhaps you need to let go of the past and stop holding on to what was and concentrate on what is. On the other hand, you are attempting to disguise a situation and refusing to see it as it really is. You need to learn acceptance.

Insanely accurate. I hate my subconcious sometimes.

Losing to life

You tell em Chucky.

一切都是天意, 是命運. 誰也逃不離. 終究已註定.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011


Remember themmmmmm??? Little Rascals??? Alfalfa and Darla?!?!?

Monday, August 8, 2011

Slumber Coma

Since i've came back from San Diego, i have been completely out of routine. I've been doing nothing, in terms of my freelance plus job hunting situation (except for maybe that one night where I did my all-nighter for this infographic that I wanted to send in to one particular company). I haven't been to the gym since as well (except on Saturday, which felt great because my body feels like its been run over by a bus!) and i feel like shit even more because of that. On top of that, i've been sleeping A LOT. I mean taking these two and a half hours naps during the day. I would be chatting and then I would be gone because ive fallen asleep on my oh-so-comfy bed behind me. What's even worst is this slumber coma that i fell into yesterday. Pretty much i slept ALL DAY yesterday. Partially because of this nagging painful headache that did not go away since Saturday afternoon, partially my upper body was sore from the gym (whenever bod is sore = me wanna sleep) and then, just because i felt like sleeping even though i SHOULD be doing a bit of freelance work. Um, i took a 4 hour nap before dinner. Ate dinner, ate cake for dessert on the couch but started to fall asleep!!! I then just gave up and went to bed at 7pm. Ridiculous no? I woke at 1115 and decided that i should just sleep through the night and wake up at 530am. Mainly because i fear i might turn into a vegetable if i let myself sleep until 10am- which im sure i would have been able to do.

I've been fairly productive when it comes to seeing people and going out though! That said- I MISS MY COUSIN. Its official. I don't remember what her face looks like no more and it makes me saddddd. So so sadddddd. Big sad face. I hopes to see her soon before our annual camping trip next week??? Pweleaseee??

I guess its good that im up right now and blogging (yesh! its only 7am). But i'm really losing focus. Its extremely difficult to stay positive when you've been in this limbo of a stage for almost two years now (its been TWO summers). Its not really like i haven't gotten any responses either because at least it shows that i'm doing something right. I must really be the talks when people gossip about who's doing what after graduation and me, K, been completely useless. Unemployed for this long, not really going anywhere with life amongst other things. Out of all people, i am seriously the last fucking person to be in this type of situation and here i am. All this bad luck- i'm convinced one of you wankers cursed me.

Especially lately, I've told myself, those are just vain words, from an empty mind. (I say mind because of one specific person). But ive always been that person that really gives a shit about what others think. I cannot, help but let that ruin me. But seriously, this person's two-faced-ness makes me bloody sick. I mean, if you are going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty, bitch. Ugh. 

And of course, right when I act spontaneously (i do that a lot)- my dreams (the ones i get at night, not the froo froo ones) brings me back to a broken reality and tells me, its not going to happen. Bummer, really. I think its this loss of focus that's causing me to lose that control i had over how i feel.

Or it might even be that- the cause of my slumber coma. mEEEH. we shall see this week.


Friday, August 5, 2011

Blackberry 7 Fan Night

I thought this evening deserved its own post purely because i am sucha Blueberry fan and the evening was purdy epic. Thnx to J, i was his guest to a social event at the Fifth. I didn't really think much of it until i reached the club and noticed there was a huge line-up. As if that did not give away how awesome the inside was going to be, all the "open bar" tweets that populated my timeline did it for me.

The fifth in general is a very posh venue so I did not expect it to be any less than chic in terms of ambiance. The music was great, the food was pretttty good (or whatever I was able to eat anyways). The people dressed nicely, photographers, a photobooth (that i wish i took advantage of more) and of course, can't go wrong with open bar. (J got disgustingly plastered. i loved every moment of it hahah)

The purpose of the event was to promote the new OS7 blackberry phones that are coming out in September. The main feature is the touchscreen for ALL the phones, including the BOLD (the one i am MOST excited about) Torch and the shit Storm which is now also called the Torch (even though everyone called it the Touch that night....whateves). The phones are pretty nice. I'm REALLY excited to get it in September once my contract is up. My phone is SO ghetto with its beat-up keyboard and shell plus the OS majorly lags. People yelped at the sight of it that evening.

And of course, a party would not be complete without a lootbag. But with what?!?!

Uh huh. That's right, im totally bragging. Cue the jealousy.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


For the past week or so ive been having reoccurring themes in my dreams. I'm not going to go into detail of what im dreaming of but they're all the same just different settings. Its gotten to a point where, i know whats going to happen next in the dream and i just go along with it like a script. I did my analysis, i did the dissection of details and it all points to the same thing. The part that's really sad though, is in the dream when it happens, i tell myself "to be as happy as long as you can and not question anything". I would then wake up with zero expectations and zero hope. Don't know which part is worst- zero hope or knowing that the only way to experience it is when im asleep. How freaking sad is thattttt.

i also get these creepy dreams too (that ive told the cousin about). but im not gonna get into that.


Monday, August 1, 2011

How futbol has become my substitute for a boyfriend

I stole this from my friend G on facebook and it was originally named, "How volleyball has become my substitute for a girlfriend." but instead i replaced all the words, 'volleyball', 'girlfriend', to 'futbol' and 'boyfriend' respectively plus a couple of modifications. Honest to god, its EXACTLY how i feel about futbol and i absolutely had to steal it ahhahha. COMPLETE CREDIT GOES TO HIM!!!! If you're reading this- YOU ROCK AND I OWE YOU A SHOT!!! =]]]

oh, you can also subsitute the word FUTBOL with ARSENAL too.

1) I show up early and stay late for futbol games.
2) I spend more time and energy thinking about futbol than anything else.
3) Wherever I am in the world, I'm always thinking about futbol.
4) I am willing to spend money I don't have on futbol shirts, futbol games, futbol merchandise, future futbol trips.
5) I am willing to cancel prior plans to watch futbol.
6) I am unwilling to break plans to watch futbol unless I absolutely have to.
7) I love to introduce futbol to everyone and I want all my friends to love futbol.
8) While watching futbol demands so much, it rewards me for my loyalty with their wins and the player's happy tweets.
9) Everytime I think I've figured something out about futbol, it does something to let me know I still have lots to learn.
10) I commute out of my way to watch futbol.
11) Futbol requires more commitment; both time and effort, than I have ever given to anyone or anything.
13) My relationship with futbol has become akin to an abusive relationship: I suffer injuries and trauma watching futbol but in the end, I come crawling back to it because I love it so much.

Its sad but true. I LOVE YOU ARSENAL.

i know i fail

i know i know i promised a PRE-SANDIEGO trip post.

That obviously did not happen.

But here i am, i made the effort, i put on my face and travelled my arse to the ghettos of what they call scarbaria, to sit down in a dark corner at a Starbucks/Chapters (because i know my usual SB will be packed to the max with asians who are afraid of the sun) with two and a half venti drinks by my side.

So greetings, to whoever that hasn't given up on me. Indeed i am back (duh) for exactly a week. Ive been sick (a cold with fever to be precise) the minute i got off of that much delayed plane hence the terrible lag in updating. To contribute to further delays, the minute i felt remotely better i was out of the house and not in front of the computer. When i was, it was only to watch my Arsenal games and....not blog.

Right, i shall stop it with the excuses! Onwards with zee trip.

San Diego was a lot of fun. It didn't really feel like a 7 day trip because everyday went by extremely quickly because we packed it in with what seems like a zillion things to do each day. I don't really want to bother going into great depths of what we did each day because that's boring. I think a general outline will suffice?

The first three days of the trip was dedicated mostly to doing tourist-like stuff and running errands. We stayed at the Mariott Residential Suites where there was an in-suite kitchen (completed with cutlery and cookware) for us to make food and pretty much live there comfortably for a week. Great place. The cleaning ladies did our dishes (we are SO awful), they delivered a toothbrush to us in the middle of the night, excellent warm morning breakfast buffet and HOT WATER ALL THE TIME. No complaints what so ever about the hotel.
As for living with the boys, thankfully and miraculously i survived. Its a good thing that K is a very neat and clean boy and i know most of lx's habits thus there was no need to try to poison their eggs. For most days, we slept around midnight and got up at 4am (or at least i did). We made lunchboxes for convention days, ate breakfast in (whether it was the hotel buffet or stolen food from the hotel buffet from the day before), and public transited our arse to the con (which was a 45 minute trip each time). I'm proud of our very economical ways.

San Diego as a city is very lovely. I especially lurve their Gaslamp district which is equivalent to our distillery district, queen street and king street - all in one. Because our commute was so long and treacherous, we were not able to spend that much time there after the convention for offsite events and after parties. Personally if i was with other people id probably stay out til 4am and forget sleep but i chose to be a tad bit more responsible and opted to NOT do that. Also plus i couldn't really afford the drinking. If i was to go back id DEFINITELY want to party it up nice and hard there.

As for the actual convention, from a perspective of a wannabe-geek: it was AMAZING. I can only imagine for much more hardcore geeks, how much MORE amazing it must have been. I was not able to attend as many panels as i hoped to. Mainly because i was quite naive in believing that i only had to lineup max, 3 hours for a more "popular" panel but in reality that turned out to be about 3 hours MINIMUM waiting time and went up to 5-7 hours for my longest day. One of my tweeters tweeted me: Seems like all you are doing is that (line up). Which in fact that really WAS all i did. If you guys been through my albums, you would see how fukking ridiculous the line-up to go to some of these panels were. You really would not understand unless you were there. I have never seen anything like that in my life.

It was a joy to see everyone cosplay and i guess what made it count the most was the fact that nobody was judging anyone. You'd be surprised but there's people of ALL ages there- families, seniors, teens, kids, middle-aged Asian women, big black guys that cosplays. Its really not just, socially awkward fat white dudes as stereotypically comic geeks are portrayed as. There were some REALLY good looking guys too (BELIEVE IT OR NOT), so it was like a big satisfying buffet for me. Giggles giggles.

The real moment of the trip though, was when i touched Alex Skarsgards (Eric Northman from True Blood) thigh. It was so bloody amazing. I told EVERYONE that i knew about this. I was practically shaking after he handed my pass and sharpie back to me (fuk ya for bringing extra markers!!). But what made it EXTRA sweet was that i got sweet fucking revenge on this bitch that stole my seat earlier in the afternoon. She was behind me (even though she sat much closer to the stage then me) and was trying to get to him. She dropped her marker and USUALLY, i would pick it up for the person (even though it was seriously a fucking stampede. GIRLS ARE WILD) but no. For stealing my fucking seat, you get your marker kicked AWAY from you. That's right. I won't stay angry. i get fucking even. Don't mess. Karma is a BITCHHH.

i digress.

If i was given a chance to go again- i definitely WOULD go and l would probably dress up as well. It was nice to be surrounded by people who share the same excitement as you as oppose to people who don't understand why you are so excited about a fictional character. I know that a lot of my friends think im a tad bit weird for being such a geek and even though they don't say it nor judge me (not that much anyways lol), i do still feel a bit left out and a bit like a loser. Its not really their fault though because society has set up this aspect to be subjected to lots of judging. But its like that feeling that you get when all the popular kids talk about all the cool things they did on the weekend and asks you what you did and your the odd one standing out like a sore thumb. Yeah, its that feeling i get sometimes but its ok! I'm use to it!! And i have the boys to turn to for things like this.

So that's my trip is a nutshell! If i will be seeing you i will probably add in more detail and if you're just a reader than....i guess that's all you get.

l'll write up another entry on just a general update.....soon. HA.

tweeet tweeet