Farewell

I  think this is it.

The end of yescinderella at blogspot.

I've decided to do a migrate over to somewhere else (the link which you can find below) because this blog here has no longer motivate me to write on it anymore. I can't tell whether its because I feel like I just don't have the time to blog any more, no inspiration or a combination of those plus one more. Perhaps its the new job and everything is just going so well but a part of me feels like this blog is just a piece of the past that I live in whenever I blog here.

PREFACE
I started out blogging over on Asianavenue when I was in post-grade 12 because of 6453. From there I moved over to Xanga and assumed the online handle of Saymuidang on Monday, January 03, 2005. I later switched to Dorkus_x on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 because then too, I wanted to leave some things behind and I thought switching blogs would help me with that. Finally on 2008 I moved here, to blogspot and have posted 748 entries in 1460 days.  Not too shabby i reckon.

BODY
With all that history, stats, numbers etc. set aside- in lament terms- I've been fucking blogging for the past 7 years and I really don't want to lose that spark and individuality that sets me apart from everyone else. I love blogging, so so much. I defines me. There has yet to be a single person whom ive met (well maybe except one other person and maybe @annnbug too) who has actually kept up with blogging for more than 2 years.

It has been so, SO incrediably tough. I've struggled and fought so, so hard since May of 2010. Relationship-wise and Career-wise, not going to lie, it was a battle that i truly felt I could not win in. I would lose to life, lose to everything- ultimately consuming me.

But then just like that, it seems like everything just decided to fall into place. Which brings me to present day. This blog has documented the bigger portion of my life that i considered to be the happiest. The days of bliss and when i felt like I was the happiest and luckiest person on the face of this earth. Something i am unbelievably thankful for but also something that is in fact, the past.

CONCLUSION
I never felt more for the need to move forward because i want to. I want to and need to leave this piece of my past behind. I feel like a part of me will always wait if I keep up with this blog and I don't want that. I am so tired of those days, I just don't want to look back anymore. You all may think that i am pretty lame and stupid at this point because this is JUST a blog. Well um, fuck you. Someeeeoneee ate a big bowl of bitchflakes today. You clearly don't know me. i dont care much about those who don't understand me.

ANYHOO.

From now on going to be doing my blogging here: http://2-nd-chances.tumblr.com/

I haven't really done much over there but soon enough. I'm slowly building it up. I shall also be doing my 2011 annual review of my year over at this new place.

I'll probably come back to blogspot one day when im bored of tumblr (its more of a micro-blogging website aka on-the-go-lazy blogging). Under a different handle of course.

oooo. And guess what people?

Peace out blogspot.

change

so.

IM TEST BLOGGING SOMEWHERE.

Lets see how that goes. if it goes well. l'll put the link.

and happy new year kids!

Its been a while

I know...i havent updated....in over a month.

That's pathetic of me.

With that said, everything is great. I REALLY want to do an annual reflection of my year as I have been doing for the past 6 or 7 years.

Everything is finally coming together.

a bloody mess

thats what i am

i miss blogging

 鐘意一個不應該鐘意的人是最大的笑話 ha ha ha. 

Going to find a day to blog. I miss it. And I'm sure you people miss me. 

 I hope. 

2nd Day

Dear lord i am EXHAUSTED.

Why? Because my commute to work is TWO BLOODY HOURS...........ONE WAY. Yes that's right, i bus, subway and streetcar it to work. I lose four hours of my day, every single day and mark my words- i am cranky as fuck. So dont get in my way.

That said, absolutely wonderful first day of work yesterday. This is what work seriously should be like. I mean, aside from the horrid commute and possibly the lack of eye candy (which isnt too bad because i could focus on work as oppose to these 'eye candy'), its a pretty awesome place to work at.

Some highlights of my first day-

• Orientation done at Starbucks. Drinks on manager. Win #1
• The people at the office dress SOOOOO nicely. ESPECIALLY the boys on my team. Motivates me to not look like a slob. Win #3
  
• Brand new IMAC and Macbook Pro, out of the box. For me to take home if please (obvs i know it means taking work home. OH WELL). Win #2
• My team (Strategy and Analytics....yes i work with the Math Squad of the company) were sweethearts and took me out for Beer and Wild Boar. Best lunch, ever.Win #4
• Also found out my co-workers are alcoholics like myself. Win #5
  
• Arsenal won our game. Win #6
• Twitter desktop allowed and installed. Win #7

Oh and it rained like a bitch too. Can't forget that. But that's not a win.

Yeah, definitely a good two days. Me happys.

AND AND......................HALLOWEEN THIS WEEKEND!!! YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!!!!

i shall leave it at that. toodles!

Losing to life

Greetings everyone (to who comes around stillllllllll). I am back with somewhat of an update.

SURPRISE TO ALL YOU MONDAY MORNING PEOPLE.

My last blog was almost a month ago and ive been told by SO many people to do something about it (im so sorry! lol). To whom i speak to and are close with, they all knew that i was seriously losing it. Everything was just not okay. I was unhappy. I was frustrated. Job searching and interviews hit a halt. I got sick. I couldn't let go of certain things. Arsenal was doing poorly. I reached the end of my savings. Everything was so bleak and i felt like i just couldn't win. I was losing to life and I was losing badly. Defeat caught up with me and was killing me. I tell myself everyday that "it shall pass" and i just need to keep on going but it got increasingly difficult.


Then just like that. BOOM. Everything comes together in ONE WEEK.

In one week, two things.

First,

1.5 years of FT unemployment. Roughly 75 applications (give or take two)- i am bloody finally fucking employed. Fuck. It was literally one thing after another. E-mailed application > Interview (Design challenge, 4 people interview) > 2 hours later when i was STILL on the bus, call back for ref check > ref check, design challenge #2, Phone interview > Offer emailed to me at 5pm, Friday.

BOOM BITCHES. That's for all of you who would kill to see me fall.

I work my ass off, applying, constantly coming up with new, creative things to add to cover letters, infographs, etc. I did this without the help of anyone and I am proud as hell with myself and i am NOT afraid to be vain and admit that.

That said, to all my girls? This Christmas is going to be awesome. JUST SAYING.

Second, 

I still, might, perhaps, maybe, not know exactly what i want. But ive never been more sure of what i DON'T want. Consider it another lesson learned for me. Today's Shiv's Bridal Shower confirmed with me even more, of what is it that i do want. At the end of the day, i am STILL okay with being single. Until i find my Azza (footy player) of course.

# # #

i'm turning a quarter of a century in a week and a half.....ish. And i have NOT felt better than this in a VERY long time. Except perhaps my weight. (Definitely fatty mode again). But im not going to complain because this is SO much better than I asked for.

oh. and Arsenal is starting to look hopeful again.

THANKKKK YOUUUUU JEEEEBUS.