fffound- futbol rant

This is just for you annnbug....and any futbol pervs that googled "Iker Casillas" & "sex-ible"

Why Iker Casillas is Hot

1. Hot damn! Look at this GQMF. just look at him! There’s not even a need for a description but I’m going to write one anyway! His name is Iker Casillas Fernandez! No, it’s not pronounced Eyeker Casillas. It’s more like Eeker Casillas and he’s from motherfucking Spain. Do I have your attention now?
   
2. This BAMF is the captain of the Spanish National soccer team and co-captain of Real Madrid FC. That’s right; he commands ten other motherfuckers on the pitch. Not to mention he has badass goalkeeping skills that make you wet your panties. And you know he’s flexible as hell. That’s why they call him Saint Iker in Spain. That’s right; he’s the patron saint of sexy.
   
3. That profile! Don’t even get me started on that motherfucking profile. Go ahead and find someone with a better profile. One word: failure. (LOL) Take in the chiseled face! look at the fine ass chin! Most importantly, DAT ASS! Can you believe he can work a fucking beard too? It makes you want to sexup in a fucking jungle or a cave or something. (<-HAHAH)
   
4. He can’t speak English much (LOL) but who cares when he can whisper sweet fucking nothings to your ear in Spanish! Are you naked now? Not even his teammates can get enough of this sexy bitch. Never! And you know you’re sexy as hell when David Beckham wants a piece of your fine ass. Their bromance was the best bromance of all time!
   
5. Oh, did he just eyefuck you? Don’t you dare lie, bitch! And did you think he’s only badass? This bitch is sweet as fuck. Just look at his smile. Not only is he an athlete, he does charities too. You got that right! He goes around the world to help needy kids. Did I just say kids? He loves kids and kids love (HAHAH) So here are some pictures of him with kids. Yeah I know my panties are soaked too.
6. Remember, Iker Casillas is a god. Gods are used to getting what they want, when they want it. If you’re going to be with Casillas, you better be prepared to deliver, because if he wants to fuck you in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you; you better fuck him in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you. (this killed me.)

Okay now this is the real treat for you Annbug. hahah (im actually unsure whether you've read this or not since i swear you have probably gone through every single article written about this god) but im going to post this as entertainment for me too.

Why Yoann Gourcuff is Hot

1. Jesus Mother fucker! Before you ask yourself, “WHO is this fine specimen of manhood and where can I fuck him?”, let me introduce him. This is Yoann Gourcuff. If you are admiring his name’s foreign, “Where is he from?” quality, it’s because he IS deliciously foreign, bitch. He’s French (i.e. endless amounts of French sweet nothings all up in your ear!). And he plays for France’s national football team.
2. Now that you are acquainted, let me reveal more. This French pastry seems to struggle with keeping his clothes on. Common sense is what this piece of ass has. If you have a body like this, it would be a total douche-fucker move to hide it from the world. (LOLOL) And it’s perfectly fine that you just jizzed in your pants so hard you need to clean your floor. This, this, and this will cause that. Excuse me while I look for my Swiffer.
3. This man has style, both fully clothed and partially nude. He likes to keep things classy, with a bad boy edge, which is an automatic turn on. Partial to outrageously beautiful leather jackets, classic white tees, and all black get ups, a person will not only lust after his wardrobe, but also his nether regions. Just imagine dressing his nether regions with parts of your own body. And you know your parts will fit his parts like a glove. YOWZAH! (HAHA)
4. His eyes. Those ojos, oh wait, wrong language. Well, you know this fine piece of ass will make you speak all sorts of languages… in bed. Those orgasm inducing green eyes pierce into your soul all while undressing you and fucking you within an inch of your life. Talk about skill.
5. The face the Greek Gods hand chiseled. The flawlessly defined chin and jawline. That beautiful smile, thick, black hair, defined nose, and perfect eyebrows (they forgot eyelashes) are enough to leave a person speechless. All I can say is you’re welcome… and I’m going to go and have some ‘personal’ me time. Au revoir.

Please allow me to recover from just pissing my pants laughing for five minutes non-stop alone in my room like a crazy perverted cat lady in heat and needs a mating partner ahahahha