A Writer's Craft

I really should be heading to sleep but i have like a gazillion things i want to blog about. It's also hot like a sauna in my room and its discouraging me from sleep. I really need to get that fan that ET has (or use to have, no clue if its still there lol) in his room, i remember it being super cold and nifty because it had a remote....haha

Anyways, so ever since ive gotten my new bed i haven't been really doing anything aside from sleeping in it with my laptop. It's actually very terrible and so lazy of me because im neglecting all the other trillion things i have to do but instead i've been watching Young and Dangerous on Youtube.

I'm also in total facebook uploading-picture mode but i think i am going to hold off for a bit more.

Earlier this evening while (still!!!) cleaning my room, i came across my familiar cardboard box filled with highschool things. Mainly, it was homework, assignments and projects which i kept after all these years because i thought they would somehow come in handy one day (i finally threw them out tonight). I came across one thing that i am definitely going to keep, and its my Writers Craft binder. Writers Craft in HS was a course that allowed students to explore different styles of writing, and this ranged from writing screenplays, children's literature, to poems and journalism. I was particularly fond of this class because of the English teacher that taught the course. She was one of those teachers that you know she really cares about her students and really loves English. It was also great, how she would casually intertwine how much she loves drinking beer and Mel Gibson in the middle of her lessons.

Anyways, one of the things we had to do at the beginning of every class was to write in our journal. We had to choose a topic from this long list of different ideas of what to write about. The catch here was for us to write non-stop for like, five-ten minutes or something and we cannot stop, our pens/pencils have to keep on moving as we basically word vomit on paper. I looked through every entry that i wrote for that class and i completely forgot i wrote any of the stuff i was reading. A couple of lines i wanted to point out that stood out to me as i went through my notebook of scribbles.

In our first entry, we were told to write "a letter to yourself in January"(it was September), then we had to staple it and cannot look at it until January. Some stuff i wrote:

"I want the January-you, to be happy. I hope by January, you and 6453 are together. If not, i know it will be painful but i know you will survive. You have friends that will help you through it. i repeat, you will be okay"

"Remember your pact with C. He wants you to have inspiration back in your life"

- Holy crap, thats some crazy, intense emo stuff i wrote to myself there.

In another entry, i had to write about the people i love most in my life and i wrote,

"My brother, is someone whom i cannot live without for one second in my waking life"

- That hit me really hard, because as much as i fight with him, screamed at him, and in some ways we have grown apart in the past couple of years- i haven't once slowed down to tell and remind myself, how important my brother is to me. This shows how FAST my life has been moving for the past five years. Its absolutely unbelievable. There was a lot more stuff that stood out but too lazy to retype.

In general, after finish going through the entire notebook, it makes me really want to get back into reading and writing. I should make a habit to start doing these writing exercises where instead of typing, i should WRITE in a notebook and just do a crazy word vomit. I just read one of the article assignments that i wrote and damn it was well-written. I am SO impressed with myself Haha lol When i was a kid for like a good period i wanted to be a writer when i grew up. Pwahah i remembered the exact moments when i told myself i COULDN'T be a writer, i was pretty sad, yet it was a realistic decision at the age of ten. lol

In another one of the entries, i wrote:

"Reading makes me who i am. I have always been proud to be the one that read the most out of everybody as i was growing up."

I am almost ashamed of reading and retyping that because i have honestly just stopped reading over the years when it was such an important part of my life as i was growing up (Twilight and Harry Potter doesn't count). Growing up with English as a second language was brutally painful. My parents did not know a word of English, let alone teaching me the basics of the language. Whenever i needed help, i was to call my older cousins (probably at the time in middle-highschool) for help. I guess as a child i've always been very "proud" and did not like calling and asking for help because i wanted to do things on my own (actually i am still like that). Because of that, i learned everything on my own. I read twice as much as the Caucasian kids in the class and brought home more books than any of the kids because i refused to be in ESL with the other minority-race kids. I even began to ask my parents to buy me as much books as they can afford so i can learn and be "good" at English. It did pay off though, as i began to win awards and was recognized for being a "top" reader in my class. As I got older, i started to read less and it got to a point where i just stopped but I picked it up again last summer. Then I totally stopped again when school started.

I'm disappointed in myself, as to why i would let something that was so important to me slip away like that. The consequence of that is my now- shitty-English that i get criticized for at work.

Yeah, i am so going to start ordering from Amazon right now.
BUT, sleeep first.


Outs.
pS. Excuse the grammer & typo.