RECAP: Halloween Extravagenzaaa

Why do i love halloween? Because i can dress up as a slut and not be JUDGED. Haha over the years i find that Halloween has become the "day" where girls can dress slutty and not feel bad about it. It's also a day where if you are taken- you tend to want to ditch the boyfriend to be single for one night. I think guys who has girlfriends have every right to be concerned to be honest haha

Anyways so everybody knows Halloween is MY holiday. It is probably the only holiday i would spend massive amounts of money supporting (Christmas might actually even come second behind that because im pretty cheap). This year i pushed it and partied three nights in a row-

UTSC (Open Bar) FEAR Party where I was a "Distraught Sailor maiden awaiting her tall, dreamy fernando torres look-alike sailor to come back from sea....while having a few drinks".

• It was an open bar party that did not serve shots. fail fail fail. 
• There was only two "bars" serving about 300 rowdy, demanding university kids wanting to get the most out of open bar. Clearly it did not work out.
• The dinner was crappy banquet food. I think the best part of my dinner was the sad dinner roll.
• The music however was the best and most amazing music i have ever danced to in my entire "going out" life. Hands down. 2001-2003 Top 40s were played and i'm sure the youngins did not recognize. A solid track of Socca was played (Love. R and Cousin knows that's my high), even Justin Bieber was played but obviously i froze and decided id rather get myself more drunk than to dance to him.
• I got a good buzz but it wasn't enough for an All you can drink fest.

TruBlood @ Club V where that night I was a "A morbid ER Vampire Nurse that was turned accidentally during sexy time with Damon Salvatore. Bite Marks evident all over body."

• I'm officially very fond of STRONG martini's now. 
• Nice small club that was filled with non-asians. We must've been the ONLY asians there. 
• Which was nice. Because that just mean's we were the center of attention! 
• Oh and 60% of the club didn't dress up (lameee), which made us look even more exotic and exciting.
• Don't remember much about the music- i was hugely distracted by the throbbing pain in my feet and True Blood was being played on the screens. I was kind of watching the episode while dancing haha
• I almost broke my fingers. It's visibly bruised and still hurts as i type with it. 
• Met up with a very, VERY drunk A and her girls for pho!!! They looked so so cute....when A's head was not down on the table. Haha The introductions were up to us.

And LASTLY, Masquerade Event @ Rockwood where i dressed up as something i've planned for a YEAR now which was a " Flirtatious Victorian belle sipping too strong martini's, in search of a perfect gent at the town masquerade ball."

• I honestly did NOT think i was going to survive a 3rd night of dancing in pumps and drinking
• Obvs, i survived. 
• I mentioned here that i was hoping someone can get me these shoes to wear as part of my costume right? Next thing you know- Cousin presents me my birthday present.
  
  

• FUCK I LOVE YOU.
• So noticed how earlier i felt like i wouldn't survive the night? Yeah i survive the night BECAUSE OF THESE SHOES. They are the MOST comfortable shoes i have ever worn in my life. I compare that feeling of comfort to wearing my runners. That is HOW comfortable they are. 
•  Thus my Cousin is effing awesome and gave me my wish of an AMAZING COMPLETE, COSTUME for Halloween aka my birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• My costume was actually part of a "group" thing with the girls, R and Cousin looked so fabulous in their gettup too. 
• We were actually EARLY at the club....for the first time in my life. It was a strange feeling. But we were able to get bypass and everything which was nice.
• To be very honest, i was SO drunk that everything from the moment we stepped onto the streetcar, everything is very foggy and fuzzy. i dont even remember if the music was any good, i don't remember people's costumes, i don't remember who i saw (no that's a lie, i saw many people i did NOT want to see), i don't remember what we danced to. Oh man. Not good. 
• By the end of the night i was actually sick of drinking and i don't recall even drinking much from the bottle we bought
• which btw was SO sketch because we didn't get a booth but got a SIDE TABLE by the stairs. Some VIP service we got. argh. 
• Met up with C and went home with her at the end of the night.

Ahhh that's it? lol Thanks to everybody who went along with my madness. You guys have no idea what it means to me, to be able to go out and celebrate halloween like this. I'll load pics on fb once i steal em from people's cameras lol HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! UNTIL NEXT YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Which i already know what i am going to be.

Weekend done. Birthday week starts? woot woot. teehee.

Like G6

Okay during the summer, my "club" song was Usher's OMG.
I think for the fall/winter, its Far East Movement's Like a G6.

.......

i absolutely use to hate this song. Ugh. FAK! SO ADDICTED NOW!!!

Last night was pretty epic and full of youngins.
Halloween Part 2 of 3 continues tonight biatches. Trublood Style!

Dialogue

To remember as time (and old age) will eventually destroy random memories.
Completely randomness on MSN

Twin says (12:46 AM):
 do u like dogs? do you like cats?
Me says (12:46 AM):
 depends
 i dont perfer animals
 unless its a panda
 LOL
Twin says (12:46 AM):
 panda's are dangerous
Me says  (12:46 AM):
 not if they r with their own kind
 i consider myself a panda
Twin says (12:47 AM):
 HAHAHAHAHAHAH wtf
Me says  (12:47 AM):
 HAHAHAHHAHA

We are so crazy.

How i am feeling right now

My internet speed is like an uber fat kid trying to run the track aka slow as fuck.

I'm UBER grouchy because of that right now.

The Next 3 days...futbol schedule

Reminder to self:

Night Before: Get Crunk Open Bar @ UTSC Party
Friday- Arsenal vs  West Ham United 145pm (maybe)
Chances of getting up: Extremely Slim. It's open bar.
Okay i fudged and got my dates wrong. There's no game but the drinking is still on.

Night Before: Potential V-Party. Either way i'll be dt kids.
Saturday-  Arsenal vs. West Ham 10am [ A has permanently converted me into a Gunners fan girl ], Real Madrid vs Hércules 2pm, Barcelona vs. Sevilla 4pm
Chances of getting up: I actually think i will be okay. It will be one of those "drink for the buzz" nights.

Night Before:Rockwood
Sunday- Liverpool vs  Bolton Wanderers Either 12pm
Chances of getting up: Even more slim than Thursday night

The hours are so off because all the sites keeps on giving different times and the conversion is always SO off and it makes me SO angry because i can't plan cuz im either off one hour or off four.

FAK.

But Good luck Kay for waking up for all of these.

Insightful

Chuck: Look, we can keep blaming each other for what happened that night or we can admit a harder truth. It was no one’s fault. It was fate. Tragedy.
Blair: Maybe everything would be different.... But it’s not.
Chuck: We’re holding on to the pain because it’s all we have left. But we don’t have to. We have a choice.

Goddamnit why is Gossip Girl SO insightful. This part killed too.

Paul the Octopus

If you guys havn't already heard but Paul the Octopus (read up on who he is here) died of natural causes last night (or something like that).

As you may all know that i am VERY fond of Paul because he predicted all of Spain's game (to be won by them) and as trivial as the matter is (me believing in an octopus) and delusional (in believing that its a PSYCHIC) as i am- i dont care. lol That said, i made a vow after Spain winning the World Cup that i will not eat Octopus or any Squid-like creature for the next four years (until WC2014) as a way to honor his awesomeness and thank him. Those who has ate with me would know that ive not had calamari, or cuttleball (squidballs) for hot pot, or squid for dimsum, etc. since i've made my vow.

I think i am going to continue on with that vow. Even though he's dead. Ya know, outta respect?

In addition to that, i'm going to mourn his death because i am a true Spain supporter. I am planning on wear black out tonight commemorate him.

No judging people.

Just a side conspiracy theory i have but i'm convinced that he was actually MURDERED and its someone from either the German team or the dutch team that is the culprit. (Seeing how he was originally from Germany and totally betrayed the Germans). I'm more convinced that its probably DE JONG the dutch manic- the one that likes to break people's ribs (refer to below image) and legs that committed the deed. I guess you can add ANIMAL HERO KILLER to his list of accomplishments too.

WHO DOES THAT. ARGH. Hate hate him.

................

No hating people. No hating or judging.

fffound

Fate. It’s what people invent to explain what they can’t understand. If you think someone is the one, you tell yourself it was meant to happen. And if it breaks your heart, you tell yourself it wasn’t meant to be. I’ve spent ten years trying to find a man who knows where I am in a room the moment he steps inside, without having to look. But that hasn’t happened. I can admit the truth to myself - that I’ve got lousy luck at finding love - or I can tell myself that I haven’t crossed paths with my soul mate yet. It’s always easier to be a victim than a failure.

Interesting perspective.

fffound

I find the coolest things on the net i swear.

Lazy Sunday

The weekend is coming to an end and here i am at Starbucks abusing their wireless again with my furious downloads. I tried my uber very best to not drink before Halloween but that failed miserably last night.

Went out with C to celebrate her first night "out" as a single lady with the Ward kids. After last night, i can be even more confident in saying I absolutely, absolutely HATEEEEE House music with a disgusting passion. You people would not believe how glad i was to hear No Speak Americano and then I never, EVER thought i would be SO glad to hear Far East Movement's, Like a G6 so much in my life. And then that was it. TWOOOOO Top 40s song (i guess) the entire night. All i wanted to hear was USHER or even BEYONCE (yuck) is that so much to ask for??? God. No mood. whatsoever.

 So i pretty much had two options last night-

• enjoy the music, have one vodka lime and dance the night away.
• do not enjoy the music but get hammered to a point where any music is good music, and dance the night away. 

Since the music option was limited to only the genre that i hate the most- only Option B was plausible. Even THAT did not work because it costed WAY to much to get drunk in a club. Thus it was a failed evening.

Don't get me wrong, i absolutely adored the company i was with. The guys are great, I love C and really wished the night was better (please don't feel bad lol) for the both of us. It was just unfortunate that the music was not in our favor. And that makes me REALLLLLLLLLLLLY pissed. lol

Anyhoo. Bumped into the kids just now, all hungover. It was great. lol

Amazing race tonight! Go TeamJumba!!!!!

& the short work week begins because technically my "weekend" begins on Thursday =D

I might load some new stuff later tonight.

OUTS.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 19

Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 19- Disrespecting your parents.

Short rant. 

I think that is the most rude and ungrateful thing that you can do to the people that brought you into this world, provided for you, nourished you and are probably the only two people in the world that would take a bullet for you. It disgusts me and it saddens me at the same time because even though most parents won't have it, the other minority would probably just take it.

There is no reason to need to disrespect the two most important people in your life.

And if you do, you deserve a good back-palm, bitch smacking.

Simple concept really. Common sense even.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 18

Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 18- Your Beliefs.

I believe in many, many things but i think l'll only rant about two.

First, I sincerely believe in Karma. I believe what comes around goes around (or is it what goes around comes around? ah who cares). I believe if you do goodness, goodness will return to you and viceversa, if you commit wrong-doings, it will return and bite you in the ass. Which is why i live by the phrase, 好心有好報. There are a lot of things i do for people and its evident that i am getting jipped or that i am being used but i do it anyways. A lot of people consider this as being dumb (i.e. my mother). She (and others) don't understand why i do a lot of things that does not benefit me or there are no immediate paybacks. I personally don't believe in "immediate" paybacks. I feel like by being generous and helping out purely for the act of being kind, Karma will be kind to you and it will come back to you in different shapes and forms. For me, i feel like even though i am being jipped now- i am ensuring that my future will be filled with kindness and that's when i will really need it.

That being said, through out life and recently in fact, i have question many, many times-  Do nice guys (and girls) really finish last? Why is it that i have been nice all my life, played by the rules, helped, returned, been nice to everybody but the most shit things happens to me? For example- ive returned about 3 or 4 TTC Bus Passes and not kept them for myself. I've return cell phones, portfolios, and personal belongings to people because i would think that if i was the person that lost those items, i would want someone kind to return it. I would go out of my way, bus all the way to Downsview to return a portfolio because an aspiring nurse worked at a hospital there and couldn't make it to where i found her belonging (Sheppard Station)- amongst other things. But i still get the shit end of the stick all the time. It absolutely makes no sense but i convince myself that at the end things will be okay and i shouldn't stop being who i really am and modify my behavior to become an aggresive bitch just to finish first.

Maybe its the simple-peasant way of thinking and because of this reason i will never make it big because im "too nice". Who knows.

I also did believe in happily-ever-afters (that's kind of shady right now) but i still believe in fate but the choice in choosing your own destiny (refer to blurb below).

Destiny may be seen either as a sequence of events that is inevitable and unchangeable, or that individuals choose their own destiny by choosing different paths throughout their life. In the sense of being unchangeable it is said that the different courses of action people take may still lead to a predetermined destiny.

I believe that every single person has a redeeming quality (even if i hate you), i believe nothing a Starbucks can't cure (including hangovers) and i sincerely believe that Fernando Torres is the most amazing man on the face of this earth.

Good day.

fffound

 Changes of the Bat symbol.

I thought this was pretty sick. I didn't even notice that there was a change.

Courtesy of my friends tumblr: LINK (He has pretty awesome posts that i love going through. creeper mode.)

Halloween et more.

Kids. I am going to attempt 3 days in a row partying. Thursdays, Friday and Saturday.

Currently going for 4 (Sunday).

If my feet permits me. Since i WILL be wearing heels every single one of those nights.

WAHHAHA I am soooo excited. Next week is gonna fly!!!!!!

Random:

• Meeting with Albie tomorrow to figure out work for the next 2 months (until year end). Hopefully it will be decently paid!! I'm blowing money like crazy. 
• I still need to go replace my bank card.  
• Gotta go buy a cheap agenda so i can use it for FUTBOL SCHEDULING! God, Eurocup, Premier League, NT Friendlies, LaLiga, ChampsLeague. It gets SO SO confusing and my normal agenda is not doing the job.
• i should really go see a physio. Combat twice since my month break and i'm scared that something will "rip"/"pull" again
• That said im chunky again. Sad face. RIGHT BEFORE HALLOWEEN TOO. omfg. FML Face Palm
• This is London Saturday- Warm up for next week.
• Must do halloween trial-look this weekend
• I actually look more like a maid awaiting a good banging more than anything else....sadly. THERE GOES CLASSY (slutty).
• Oh yes. and it's my birthday soon. Woop dee do.  
• Oh. and i am also going to Vegas. WHATTT.

BYE.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 17

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 16

Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 16- Your views on mainstream music

Um this topic is a bit hard for me to rant about because i don't exactly listen to "mainstream" music and i don't know if the music that i do enjoy is considered mainstream. The LAST song i downloaded was We Speak No Americano, Yolanda Be Cool & DCUP....and i don't even think that's "new". I guess mainstream is considered as Hip Hop and R&B right now? God i feel so old-school because all i listen to is 90s pop & sad r&b love songs. I only even know about the "new" stuff now is when i go to club's and that's considered...clubbing music. I use to be a little bit more in-tuned when i was still in school b/c we would listen to music on the radio in the mornings but now i don't even turn on the radio.

I guess the only comment i have on mainstream music is that everything is about SEX. Lots of dutty lickin in the club kinda sex. What happened to "2 become 1...." (LOL) or "I'll Never Break Your Heart...". Hahah.

Okay i really don't know what to say. I feel lame.

ok la

I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL BLOG TOMORROW

btw. FCBARCELONA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 <33333333333333333333333
i dont need a bf lolol i just need gf's and futbol.

fffound

Facebook Stops Constantly Showing You Pictures of Your Ex
READ HERE: LINK


Seriously. And here i thought god was fucking with my head but in fact its just some algorithm gone wrong or a programmer's cruel idea of a joke.


Fuk you Facebook lol FUK CHOOOO.

今日本來是三年半

Anesthetics shut your senses off. Deaden yourself to what is happening.
- How i would love some right now

One of my closest friends is going through an unexpected breakup. I look at her and i see me in every way possible. And it kills. Something we both will never understand is how one can give you so much hope and faith in believing there is a future and in a slap of a face think otherwise. The irony in both her and i's situation is so frightening and uncanny. I wish i can make her believe that the days do get easier because it has been a bit easier. I hope i am of some sort of comfort. I love you lots dear. You're a fighter. Let's keep fighting together. As hopeless as things seems to be, we're going to get through this...

i tell myself that every single effing day.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 15

OHMYGEE I AM CAUGHT UP =D
Read the intro to this: here
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Topic 15- Your favorite tumblrs

For ALL your Spain National Futbol Team News
http://fuckyeahhspain.tumblr.com/

For all you horny Spain National Futbol Team fangirls who want to stare at really hot pics of the boys
http://themspanishboys.tumblr.com/

Devoted Criminal Fans (&& Spencer Reid geek lovers)
http://criminalminds.tumblr.com/

Two of the Best Wedding-Related Tumblrs i follow
http://fuckyeahweddingideas.tumblr.com/
http://thewhitedress.tumblr.com/

Some misc ones (only girls would enjoy)
http://littlemillionstars.tumblr.com/
http://justbesplendid.tumblr.com/
http://-tantalizedtwilight.tumblr.com/

Best Wizarding World Themed Photography
http://fuckyeahpotterphotography.tumblr.com/

Sad, Emo, Heartwrenching to the core reads
http://www.sincesheleft.com/

..................there's more but i'm too lazy to go through my list. haha

30 Topic Meme: Topic 14

Read the intro to this: here
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Topic 14- Your earliest memory.

This is going to be short because my earliest memory is so vague...hence earliest.

I must've been 2 or something? I was in diapers and i remember going into the washroom and grabbed the training potty and putting it on my head like it was a crown or something. Then i ran out into the living room and i vaguely remember feeling awesome....for a toddler.

Even then i was a dork.

But i got into shitz with my mom for putting something so dutty on my head. 

haha.

ive been mentally and emotionally burnt out

30 Topic Meme: Topic 13

Read the intro to this: here
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Topic 13- Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

At the moment, there really isn't anywhere where i would consider moving to. Obviously moving to different parts of Toronto doesn't count but i mean anywhere further. The only place that i would remotely consider is either BC or Montreal. Mainly because i am seriously a party girl at heart and i would need to be in a place where the social scene (and fashion scene) is comparable to Toronto. New York (Manhattan) would be fantastic but i think i would be struggling day by day if i was to move there.

At the moment i would love to move away and to experience the independence and the challenges out there. In truth though, i really just want to run away from all my problems. Unfortunately i am not selfish enough to do that but if i really had a choice- i wish i can do that right now, at this very minute.

Places l'll like to visit though. I have been quite a hermit in my own city and only have gotten my passport recently (8 months to be exact) so there are many, MANY places that i have NOT gone. Many things that i have never seen.

The list is pretty long and they consist of Disneyworld and Disneyland's in other COUNTRIES (i.e. the Paris one), all the usual Europe places that everybody wants to go to (for me, right now Barcelona and Madrid is TOP on that list because of Futbol...) and also all the usual Asia places that everybody wants to go to.

Going to keep it short on this one. I don't feel like blogging tonight

fffound

I really can't tell if this is for real or not yo. Supposedly this is only available in the Philippines. argh!

relapse

30 Topic Meme: Topic 12

More coming!
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 12- Bullet your whole day (Saturday)

• Woke up to texts and messages from the kids on whats going on for the day
• Organized a hot pot dinner for 12 within 2 hours
• All while watching the Arsenal Game
• Did face, went to LCBO to pick up goodies.
• Went to Starbucks to watch the second half of the Barcelona Game and then the whole Real Madrid Game
• Hot Pot with the kids
• Back to lx's to Cranium (fail) and get drunk
• Got trashed 
• I thought i lost my dad's camera for a good 12 hours. 
• Crashed

Straightforward enough? lol

i am a: Social Realist

Its just a very long personality profile that i find frightening accurate. Read on to learn (more) about me otherwise this is not very interesting. 


###

Social Realists are popular persons full of energy. They are reliable, well organized and helpful. Traditional values are important to them. Founding a family also plays a central role in their life. (eerie) Social Realists have a marked social streak. They are always ready to listen to the worries and problems of others and spare no effort when they are asked for help. With empathy and understanding, they can sense what other people need. Social Realists are always willing to highly regard the strong points of the other person and to excuse that person’s weaknesses. They are the most sociable of all personality types. Social contacts are very important to them.

Social Realists find it very difficult to cope with conflicts and criticism - harmony is their elixir of life. Acknowledgement and esteem are very important to this type. Differentiation on the other hand is not necessarily one of their strong points. At work and in partnerships, they are loyal, committed and always there when needed. They find it easy to make friends due to their open, warm manner (people like me cuz i laugh at their jokes) and they have a large circle of friends. In love, they are faithful and attentive and care for their partners with a great deal of imagination and sensitivity. Social Realists show their feelings openly and honestly. Should a relationship break up, they tend to blame themselves. That is why they find it very difficult to end a partnership even if it has not fulfilled their requirements for some time.

Social Realists are more conservative types. They have a set system of values and rules which is orientated to the prevailing traditions. They prefer clear, structured surroundings and work processes; they find too much change und unrest unpleasant. Their strong points are carefulness and reliability and not so much flexibility and spontaneity. Social Realists are open-minded towards anything new only to a limited extent. But, should one be looking for someone to fulfil a task reliably and exactly, they are the right persons.

Adjectives which describe your type: extroverted, practical, (overly) sentimental, planning, (too) emotional, temperamental, energetic, tradition-conscious, loyal, helpful, devoted, reliable, caring, objective, thorough, organised, warm-hearted, (very) open, friendly, sociable, chummy, obliging, self-sacrificing, public-spirited, sensitive (emo), kind, demanding (very LOL)

Click here to read more about MEEEE. 
I didn't want to put it all out in one entry.
Next section is on "Love" and "Career"

Week Review & Friday Catch-Up

It seems like recently I have been dedicating my Friday nights to be "rest my liver and wallet" nights and also the night that allows me to catch up with my blogging. I swear that was all i wanted to do today. I went out to hunt for the key pieces of my Halloween costume (which btw, i am extremely content to say that my outfit is 80% done!!! All that is missing at the moment is the jewelery piece *which is SHIPPED & on its wayyy*, my maskkk *which is trapped at customs! sobs* and gloves!) that took up pretty much the entire morning. Met up with someone, ran errands, dealt with a lot of frustration on the side all the while wanting to just sit down in front of my laptop and catch up on my blogging!!!!

For anybody who gives a damn, but I got a call-back for one of the positions that i applied for asking for references. Hmm that must be the first reference check ive gotten in YEARS. I hope the rat says good things. i REALLY need the extra cash flow. I'm also actually looking forward to starting work again with Albie because again, extra cash flow!!! Halloween is going to DRAIN me kids.

But i do have a message for friends.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Friends,

Can someone buy me my birthday present a couple of weeks early? Preferably by the 30th of this month so i can wear it to my Halloween parties?

I would LOVEEEE to wear these shoes as part of my costume!!!! Or even the all black laced-up version. They are 49.99 (or maybe theyre 59.99) from Payless Shoes @ Fairview. Size 6.5 or 7 please!!!!

Please don't forget that i treat Halloween like its my birthday therefore by giving me an amazing Halloween it means giving me an amazing birthday.

TEEHEE

Love,

K

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

YO. Another thing. People. I need hangers. Please txt me when you see a place that has hangers on sale!!!! I have clothes folded/layed/stuffed away everywhere in my room and its not good for the soul. Also my mom is concerned that it will attract bugs (?!?!?!?) so to rid of my mom's concern- i. need. to. buy. hangers.

THANKS.

Another meet-up with the kids tomorrow and then to see C on Sunday! The week has been way too long without our midweek meetup.

For this week (and even last), i feel like i've totally wasted it by not being productive. I'm going to make a promise to myself that next week's productivity will be triple of what it was for the past two. I really need to finish my portfolio site, complete K's invite project, start applying for jobs again and some stuff i can't think of before the other projects start-up.

Alright. Until next week another entry? Haha

Gah. I hope not because being productive also means blogging once a day for all you lovely people.

Enjoy the SIX entries (scroll down bitches) i wrote for your amusement lovely peoples. I hope i make sense. So much words makes me a little confused sometimes. OKAY. HUNGRY. BYE.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 11

Read the intro to this: here
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Topic 11-  Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.

1. Separated- Usher
2. Unpretty- TLC
3. Temperature- Sean Paul
4. Tomorrow - Brandy
5. All I have to give- BSB
6. 拍錯拖- Janice
7. 心计- Hacken Lee
8. Tearin' Up My Heart- N'Sync
9. Tell me its Real- KCI&Jojo
10. I'm Not Afraid- Eminem

30 Topic Meme: Topic 10

The fun one lol
Read the intro to this: here
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Topic 10-  Discuss your first love and first kiss.

I spill almost every dirty secret i have on this blog anyways, this is no biggy and should be the MOST interesting one out of the 30 topics i'm going to be ranting about. Let's begin.

So. First love and first kiss. Some people's first love is a different person from the person they first kissed. For the big dork that i am (and bigger dork back then) i would guessss my first "love" was also my first kiss. I can actually say 6453 was my first love even though it was SO completely one sided and he was such an obsession. Whoa big surprise right? No. Not really. My first love burned to ashes the moment he said he did not feel the same. There's that saying- 初戀你會記得一世 [ You will remember your first love forever ]. I agree with that completely. I feel like because they were the first person that you felt you would and could do anything for, its carved and benchmarks are set for what "being in love" feels like in your heart. I was dead scared that i would never be able to find somebody like him and a small part of me felt like the reason why some of the guys i "liked" never worked out because they did not possess that "part" of him that i wanted. Obviously i was horribly wrong and went on and met someone else that was the opposite of what i thought i wanted and was clearly so much happier. I craved that first love feeling when i was in the midst of my boyfriend searching (that didn't work mind' you. "Searching" will never end happily. Its when it unexpectedly shows up in front of you, that's the real deal) but at the same time i knew i was never going to get that feeling again. It wasn't because i didn't love this new person as much as i did with 6453 but because first loves tend to be what i believe is childhood fairytale love. Simple and naive. When you enter the next relationship and fall in love, you tend to be more careful, more cautious to preserve what may be a fairytale love- in the adult world. If i learned anything from falling in love with M, was that with time- wounds can heal, people can change and reasons will eventually be revealed. Because of that i have no regrets. Those faded emotions is affirmation that this time around things will be okay and i will survive. If i did not have that first love, i don't think i will believe that things do happen for the a better reason.

I genuinely believe you will encounter three people in your life.

- The person that you loved the most but can never be with
- The person that loved you the most but can never be with
- The person you love and loves you will be together forever.

At this very point, i have no idea who fits into what. I am thinking M might be the first one, but i'm really not sure. That is beyond the point though. Whether they are currently not or isss...... in my life, i do hope person #3 will reveal themselves soon or at least, eventually. Sad face.

OH. And as for first kiss. Haha (the dirty stuff!!)
It was with 6453 in Miliken park. It was excellent. It felt like i scored the winning cup at the world cup (i can't think of a better analogy haha) Especially because he was white!! It was like a triple score done blindfolded!!!! I remember going home and msged twin right away lolllll I hope i wasn't too shitty or sloppy yo thinking about it hahah. It shouldn't have been since there was a 2nd and 3rd and 4th one after that? haha

Sighs. lol Gotta love my teenage years.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 9

The catch-up continues!
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 09- How you hope your future will be like.

I find this topic to be very familiar with the "Where do you see yourself in 10 years" topic. I guess this one is asking for more of a broad idea of what i hope the future to be like.

I definitely see a family happening haha. I remember when I was little most people just thought i was going to grow up to be a housewife including myself lol Now the idea just bores me and i want to be super-mom where i can own people at work and still be able to make it to my kid's soccer games (yes my kids are playing futbol. I mean why wouldnt they? i AMMM marrying a futbol player. haha) I'm curious whether i am going to continue to be tech-savy (i hope so because i want to stalk my kids like how i stalk my friends haha) and whether i am ever going to be a good cook lol. Actually yes i do want to be able to cook AND AND, eat vegetables lol

Career-wise if i really had a choice of the path i want to take, it would be the following: Doing corporate design for some design firm during my prime peak-killer-corporate-bitch times => wedding design &/or planning => & after making a shitload of money from all that, have my own wedding dress shop to settle down with : )) Obviously life isn't that great so that is probably not going to happen but a girl can dream!

I want my future to continue to be exciting and not be so much by the routine. I hope to travel, i hope to continuously learn. I want to meet someone that will be on my ass about that and not want to sit home and watch dramas all day (we can do that on the plane!).

Again, i want a future where i am content, with a family, be as physically active as i can be (i want my kids to be able to experience all sports that i did not have the pleasure to try when i was young. this includes skiing/snowboarding), be mentally equipped (still be reading in my own library.....), still have girlfriends, host awesome dinner parties and yeah, ultimately be with someone that IS part of making my future.

In the end, i just want a happily ever after.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 8

The catch-up continues!
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 08-  A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

The moment that sticks out of my mind as being the most satisfied with life, would be the day of last year's convocation. Why? Because-

• FAMILY
• My family wasn't fighting. My mom was still working. I don't remember if my dad was or not. The family finance was not bad at all. My brother was good during that time. Everything was great. And on top of that- they all came out to see me because they knew how much it meant to me. It was so, so nice.
• CAREER
• I was one of the first people that had a full-time "post-graduate" job (even though it did not turn out all that glamorous)
• EDUCATION
• I was ACTUALLY graduating university. & i wasn't JUST graduating. I was graduating with a bunch of kids i call my 2nd family. 
• But i couldn't believe four years was over.
• LOVE
• I was in a completely blissful relationship and i received flowers from the mister-then because he knew it would make me happy. I was graduating with someone that meant a lot to me.
• FRIENDSHIP
• All the texts and congratulations i got from friends through out the morning and celebratory dinners i looked forward to after the day spent with the kids.
• I got to take the "Facebook event" group picture with the kids!!!!
• Thanks again guys for making it possible lol

There probably was more moments. But that day was the day i felt the most complete, satisfied, the most accomplished and the most loved.

30 Topic Meme: Topic 7

Okay so i am pretty much changing up this project because this whole daily blogging thing is not working for me. Either that or i have REALLY been slacking the past 2 weeks and just suffered in the blogging department. So instead of doing days, i am going to do TOPICS. Hopefully i can still do one topic a day : ) Enjoy.
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Topic 07- Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.

I am a HUGE believer in astrology and all that fun zodiac stuff. I was really obsessed with it when i was younger but i drifted away from it as i got older and found life to be more bitter and sometimes even the "stars" can't help you. From what I do recall of my zodiac sign (being a Scorpio), i do remember feeling like every "Scorpio" description fit me like a glove hence why i was a strong believer. For the purpose of this blog though, i went and researched up some info to see if it still "fits" my personality now.

Things that are true:

• Those born under this sign are dead serious in their mission to learn about others. The curiosity of Scorpios is immeasurable, which may be why they are such adept investigators. These folks love to probe and know how to get to the bottom of things. They are intuitive, probing and very focused on knowing who's who and what's what.
• This is why i am SUCHHH a stalker and creeper. I was BORN one okay. 
• Scorpios concern themselves with beginnings and endings, and are unafraid of either.
• Which would explain why i always want to know the ending and whether it would be worth it and not the journey.
• They also travel in a world that is black and white and has little use for gray.
• Aka. I, am, naive.
• Fearless Scorpios rarely lose; they just keep on going, since they are stubborn and determined to succeed 
• I'm just REALLY lazy. Otherwise i wouldn't lose all the time...
  
• Scorpio's colors? Powerful red and serious black.
• Hells Yes. I think i mentioned this to K but my favorite color is actually red even though i have very VERY little Red clothing & red things.
  
• Scorpios are also lusty in the extreme (how else?), so they need to be mindful of their reproductive organs. 
• TEEHEHEHEH I don't need to explain this right?

Things that are sort of me:

• Scorpios don't know the word quit, which is why they usually get the job done. A powerhouse? Like no other.
• I'm actually VERY competitive. I hate when people upstage me. I secretly repay the deed if you EVER do that to me...bitches.
  
• Those born under this sign are in ultimate control of their destiny 

Things that does not fit my personality but are suppose to be "Scorpio" traits:

• Remember, they're unafraid, and a loss today simply means an opportunity for victory tomorrow.  
• I am not that strong nor optimistic
  
• They are intuitive
• Nottt attt allll haha
  
• Those born under this sign are as emotional as their waterborne brethren, it's just that they're not as likely to show it. The Scorpio's emotions are repressed, kept under cover. Again, these are secrets to be used another day.
• That's completely false. I wear my heart on my sleeves allll the frikkkin timeeee.

I would say that the majority of the description fits the person i am. What do you guys think?

Scorpios are suppose to be fierce! I don't really think i am.

Except my nails.

My nails are pretty fierce i gotta say.

fffound

The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be.

Might have shared this before. But its alright because i like this.

Currently blogging and playing catch-up. You guys will DEFINITELY have things to read late-tonight, early tomorrow because i have already typed up twooo entriesss. Boooyahhh.

So so behind

Gah. I dreamt a terrible dream last night. It was one of those cry-out-loud-pillow-wet-from-tears kind of devastating dream. I haven't had one of those in so so long. I really hate those- they're so tragic.

Anyways,

Sorry friends! I have written entries saved up but not going to publish them yet because they are incomplete!
I am so sorry, i am soo so bad at this!!!

But it should be a fun read when i do load it. A couple of em are pretty interesting : )

Halloween

Costume budget is 80 bucks. 

Dear god i hope i make it. I am already at 57.97

My inspiration:

:D

Rudeness

i dont appreciate it.

yeah you.

the one who doesnt respond when i just want to be helpful.

Terrible

THERE. I UPDATED. 
Scroll down. hahah

and i am STILL one entry behind (todays).


But i am SO tired. I am SOOO drank out....until Wednesday that is. For MWDC hahah

So instead of having Thanksgiving Butter Chicken my parents opt for Thanksgiving Hot Pot.

WHATTTT. hahah



Okay. I guess that's it. I dont even have the energy to be witty. I maxed out my blogging quota for today.

Nights!

30 Day Meme: Day 6

Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.

Those who REALLY know me would find this list superbly boring. So i apologize in advance. Also because i'm really tired. I'm going to copy and paste something similar i wrote up a year ago that would work for this.

1. I'm a fob. I listen to only chinese music, watch chinese dramas and can read chinese. 
2. My first crush was a brown boy. 
3. My first best friend was a black girl. 
4. I've stolen before. And was caught. lolll
5. When i'm stressed/working hard/angry, i listen to movie soundtracks (i.e. the Harry Potter, Sherlock Holmes, etc.) at max volume to calm myself down..
6. I owe the Toronto Public Library $200 in late fees.
7. Because i am such a "tall" asian girl, when we were little in "folk dancing"- i was ALWAYS danced as the "male" and had to partner with a girl (i feel sorry for that girl that had to be paired with she-boy aka me)....meanwhile all the other girls gets a BOY partner :(
8. My favorite food is potatoes and yams. lollllllll
9. i was totally into wrestling (like..WWE, WWF..haha) when i was little and would watch it with my mom and brother and idolized Kane (the undertaker's brother LOL)
10. As you all know probably, i am a stalker. i have the word stalker stomped all over my forehead.
11. i also have my wedding planned and am very obsessed with weddings in general. yes i follow wedding blogs even though im not a bride,i have inspiration boards, i know wedding designer names and can tell what dress is designed by whom, colors, flowers, invitations, themes, etc etc! you name it, i probably have thought of it AND can show you a picture reference.
12. ive drowned before. none of that "help help"-im drowning but my friends pulled me up in time scenario. it was the kind where the lifeguard had to jump into the giant wave pool to save me because i was too close to where the "Wave machine" was and it was pulling me down and i was at the bottom of the pool. it was absolutely embarrassing when he had to blow the whistle and two of them went after me as i swung my arms wildly and screamed for help.
13. i thought (emphasis on the word THOUGHT) i was the most bad-ass asian in my grade in middle school and dressed like a thug with a matching bandana wherever i went.
14. Growing up i've always been a target for bullies, for obvious reasons haha it wasnt pleasant.
15. i have the worst sense of smell in the world. i cannot smell anything even if its the worst BO in the world. and when i AM able to smell something.....its gotta be pretty bad...the type that makes others tear up
16. With that said i am almost legally blind (with severe astigmatism), i am clumsy b/c im tall but have little feet thus unable to balance myself, i have no sense of smell, i have TERRIBLE hearing (half of the time im actually guessing what people are actually saying. im just reallly good at hiding it). THEREFORE- i. am. a. handicap. partially.
17. Obsessed with: scarves (i have about 20 (lost five) and counting) and nail polish. even if im dirt poor i will not hesitate when it comes to buying these two things. l'll hesitate with necessities like food but not these two.
18. i have a tendency to speak really LOUD and QUICKLY when im excited. Apparently this has been a character trait of mine since grade 1, seeing that the teacher has told my dad at a parent/teacher interview that i had a tendency to not breath when i spoke, when excited.
19. i don't eat any vegetables at all, due to a psychological fear i developed when i was four. Meaning i haven't had anything relating to vegetables prior to that age. No salads, no onions in my pho, no vegetable soup, no tomato bits in my pasta, no NOTHING. I would literally pick it all out with my utensils or fingers and gross everyone out at the dinner table. those who dont know me think im being snobby and picky and those who knows questions my pooping habits. i cant win no matter what.
20. i have drank gravy before and it was effing great. i would do it again.
21. I use to be 160lbs and had a 38-40" waist. i ate and binged at night. i ate because my philosophy was im fat already, this bowl/plate/bag of whatever wont matter. i've worn my dad's straight cut jeans out of the house before because it fitted me at the time. it was a very dark dark period in my life
22. ive gone into semi-depression before. the kind where i isolated myself at lunch time, in the dark in our art hall so i can cry without anyone seeing, crying in class, crying on the bus, crying at home, crying when i was throwing up, choking on my puke b/c i was crying. it was worst then my "Fat" period. i called this my 6453 period
23. i consider myself to be a really big boy because im into guy things like pokemon, marvel, comics, creepy slasher things and perverted dirty jokes.
24. All my life, ive always been into only white guys because i think they are beautiful eyecandy and great fantasy material...but ive dated only asians....sort of. So i won't date/or approach a white guy. Unless you're soccer player. Then yes i will date you.
25. When i was five, my four front teeth were removed due to the fact my teeth were rotten from cavities. its actually pretty nasty. then over the years ive gotten root canals, more cavitiy fillings, wisdom teeth extraction and finally braces! i heart the dentist.
26. I was seriously considering going into Forensic Pathology (the art of dissecting human corpses and finding out the cause of their death) instead of GCM but i switched paths when akemi pointed out i can have no family/normal life if i choose that path of doom and depression.
27. i am the most emotional person you can meet (according to some personality test, i scored a whoooping 83% on the emotional scale. apparently 60% is the most any student has ever scored says one of my profs...pwahha i totally smashed that.)
28. i cant draw if my life depended on it. and....i call myself a "Designer". i am a fraud. (i can draw using a mouse though!!!! if that helps.)
29. When im really sad. instead of falling asleep, i go on the website www.crimelibrary.com, and read all about serial murderers, rapists, unsolved mysteries etc. its actually really creepy and i would read until the sun came up
1.  i've actually read a good 60% of the stories on that site. i think thats even more...disturbing
30. i find that the most peaceful place in the world, is sitting on the toilet with something to read. u mite wanna think twice about borrowing a book from me.

30 Day Meme: Day 5

Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.

I think everybody has gone through some sort of emo-phase so some, if not all should be able to relate. I am in no way suicidal because i cherish life very much. Even though i always whine and bitch about wanting to die because of stress and what not. At the end i know better than that and i find ending your life to be a very selfish act. Someone like me who only cares about others and not myself, i cannot bear the thought of what life would be like for family and friends if i did decide to commit the ultimate selfish act. That said, sometimes the pain is so much that death looks just that much more appealing. At least when you are dead you can't feel anymore.

I think the closest i have ever come to wanting to end my life was during the 6453 phase. I think on top of that, it was during that period that my brother was at his peak with troubles so it was very, very overwhelming for me. Since at the time 6453 was everything to me too, it was just an explosion of sadness. I don't remember specifics of that period (im probably trying to repress it lol) but i do remember that the tears did not stop. It kept on coming and I do remember losing a lot of weight from being so drained. I remember this specific night where i sat on the floor of my room after fighting with the brother and being so emotionally depressed i thought how i really just wanted to hurting and i wanted it to go away instantly. The pain of living life every single day and losing hope and yourself slowly bit by bit was excruciating. There are no words to describe what living with no hope felt like.

I was foolish.

But i got over it.

HENCE WHY IM STILL ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

I guess that would be the only time i ever thought about ending my life.

30 Day Meme: Day 4

Wrote this a couple of days ago but never got around to finishing it. 
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Day 04-  Your views on religion.

This is another topic that i am pretty neutral on. This probably means that this will be short. I tend to overwrite on topics that are either meaningful to me, i feel passionate about, have a personal connection to or all the above. Since I am neutral, i have nothing against people who have certain faiths and choose to live/act/speak a certain way because of their faith. Who am i to judge right.

The thing that does bother me though about "religion" or perhaps i should be more specific and target the people who are really religious....anyways it bugs me when THEY judge those that are either not religious or do not act/speak the way they do because of the lackof/no faith or all the above. In fact, it actually makes me very angry when I meet someone like that and obviously if i am able to list all that, it means that i know people that are like that. You should know that they would have made my you-annoy-the-fuk-out-of-me DISLIKE list if you act in any of the above listed way.

The first kind- why you aren't religious? Ah, i don't know, why are you ugly? You don't know why you're ugly right? Yeah, then i don't know why i am not religious. SHEESH. They frown, they preach, they give you the "poor-kittycat-you-don't-have-a-home" eyes. They ask you why, get upset and immediately start judging you for not devoting yourself to a faith (or THEIR faith). Somebody asked me that and they earned themselves a spot on my dislike list. Someone ELSE said- Oh you should try going to Church. Um, No. Wtf are you trying to say? Argh. I definitely do not like THAT person either because this same person was preaching to me on why i should become Christan. I thought the point of having a faith is to allow yourself to have peace and hope. What good would it do if you must convince someone to believe? Would that not defeat the purpose of having a faith? You can't make people believe but apparently this guy thinks otherwise.The guy is obviously whacked. I always thought he was a little "off".

Second- The disapproving, shame on you, ohmygee you are going to hell stare. Haha I actually get this A LOT andddddd i don't like it one bit. My lifestyle and the activities i engage myself in raises a lot of disapproving eyebrows in the eyes of true religious people. I'm sure they would love to spray me with holy water to cleanse my turdiness. I find people that are like that, are very narrow-minded. We choose to live the way we do and if i am not going to go questioning yours, don't start judging mine.

Hmmm i'm starting to sound a little angry when i am suppose to be neutral on this subject.

Going to stop.

Long Weekend biatches

I know i am TOTALLY behind on my little blogging project, i do apologize for that. I was in the middle of writing yesterday's topic when i got totally sidetracked with some Spain Futbol news and now its already 1130. I'm in bed with my laptop on a baby ironing board i am using as a mini desk (it's actually a brilliant idea of mine, turning an ironing board into a laptop "desk") and i am tired as fukkk yo. Yeps, definitely not happening. No new read, i'm sorry lol (unless you count the two previous FFFOUND entries...but i don't generally consider those "entries" because its not actually substance. Then again none of my shit is actually worth much soooo YEAH. I don't know what my point is.)(SQUIRREL!) Bright side is when the long weekend is over, you people will have PLENTY to reads abouts during the dreadful work week. (You know what, i take that back. My FUTBOL rants are ALWAYS a worthy read. I find myself to be pleasantly entertaining when my horny-oh-my-ovaries-are-on-fire mode takes over my brain).

The title of the post says it all, its long weekend and i AM going to be outs and abouts so there will probably be no new updates unless i am really drunk and start emotional blogging (the likelihood of that happening is actually quite LOW because i actually do have a secret blog where i do ALLLL my emo/drunk blogging in. HEH i am so clever) then i guess there will be something to read. Otherwise nothing new until maybe Monday....which i have set aside to be my RECOVERY DAY.

Tomorrow, France vs. Romania game with A before JC party which should be "smashing" (literally, haha again with the bad attempt at being witty) and then Sunday i believe is another GNO at a Vodka Lounge. Hopefully l'll be able to sober up in time for that! Monday like i said is recovery day for i need to be in my A game again starting Tuesday.This means i'm starting up with Beast Mode again (ive stopped for 3 weeks) and a lot of work related stuff needs to start up again.

Happy Turkey Weekend people!
No turkey for me this year, I think my family and i are having Butter Chicken instead.

Haha. Sighs.

fffound

The most brilliant illustration/map of online communities EVER. 

Click to view the actual size of the map. So so interesting. For all you online whores.

fffound- futbol rant

This is just for you annnbug....and any futbol pervs that googled "Iker Casillas" & "sex-ible"

Why Iker Casillas is Hot

1. Hot damn! Look at this GQMF. just look at him! There’s not even a need for a description but I’m going to write one anyway! His name is Iker Casillas Fernandez! No, it’s not pronounced Eyeker Casillas. It’s more like Eeker Casillas and he’s from motherfucking Spain. Do I have your attention now?
   
2. This BAMF is the captain of the Spanish National soccer team and co-captain of Real Madrid FC. That’s right; he commands ten other motherfuckers on the pitch. Not to mention he has badass goalkeeping skills that make you wet your panties. And you know he’s flexible as hell. That’s why they call him Saint Iker in Spain. That’s right; he’s the patron saint of sexy.
   
3. That profile! Don’t even get me started on that motherfucking profile. Go ahead and find someone with a better profile. One word: failure. (LOL) Take in the chiseled face! look at the fine ass chin! Most importantly, DAT ASS! Can you believe he can work a fucking beard too? It makes you want to sexup in a fucking jungle or a cave or something. (<-HAHAH)
   
4. He can’t speak English much (LOL) but who cares when he can whisper sweet fucking nothings to your ear in Spanish! Are you naked now? Not even his teammates can get enough of this sexy bitch. Never! And you know you’re sexy as hell when David Beckham wants a piece of your fine ass. Their bromance was the best bromance of all time!
   
5. Oh, did he just eyefuck you? Don’t you dare lie, bitch! And did you think he’s only badass? This bitch is sweet as fuck. Just look at his smile. Not only is he an athlete, he does charities too. You got that right! He goes around the world to help needy kids. Did I just say kids? He loves kids and kids love (HAHAH) So here are some pictures of him with kids. Yeah I know my panties are soaked too.
6. Remember, Iker Casillas is a god. Gods are used to getting what they want, when they want it. If you’re going to be with Casillas, you better be prepared to deliver, because if he wants to fuck you in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you; you better fuck him in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you. (this killed me.)

Okay now this is the real treat for you Annbug. hahah (im actually unsure whether you've read this or not since i swear you have probably gone through every single article written about this god) but im going to post this as entertainment for me too.

Why Yoann Gourcuff is Hot

1. Jesus Mother fucker! Before you ask yourself, “WHO is this fine specimen of manhood and where can I fuck him?”, let me introduce him. This is Yoann Gourcuff. If you are admiring his name’s foreign, “Where is he from?” quality, it’s because he IS deliciously foreign, bitch. He’s French (i.e. endless amounts of French sweet nothings all up in your ear!). And he plays for France’s national football team.
2. Now that you are acquainted, let me reveal more. This French pastry seems to struggle with keeping his clothes on. Common sense is what this piece of ass has. If you have a body like this, it would be a total douche-fucker move to hide it from the world. (LOLOL) And it’s perfectly fine that you just jizzed in your pants so hard you need to clean your floor. This, this, and this will cause that. Excuse me while I look for my Swiffer.
3. This man has style, both fully clothed and partially nude. He likes to keep things classy, with a bad boy edge, which is an automatic turn on. Partial to outrageously beautiful leather jackets, classic white tees, and all black get ups, a person will not only lust after his wardrobe, but also his nether regions. Just imagine dressing his nether regions with parts of your own body. And you know your parts will fit his parts like a glove. YOWZAH! (HAHA)
4. His eyes. Those ojos, oh wait, wrong language. Well, you know this fine piece of ass will make you speak all sorts of languages… in bed. Those orgasm inducing green eyes pierce into your soul all while undressing you and fucking you within an inch of your life. Talk about skill.
5. The face the Greek Gods hand chiseled. The flawlessly defined chin and jawline. That beautiful smile, thick, black hair, defined nose, and perfect eyebrows (they forgot eyelashes) are enough to leave a person speechless. All I can say is you’re welcome… and I’m going to go and have some ‘personal’ me time. Au revoir.

Please allow me to recover from just pissing my pants laughing for five minutes non-stop alone in my room like a crazy perverted cat lady in heat and needs a mating partner ahahahha

commerce court

i always get nostalgic when im down there alone. the change is unbelievable.

Back to downtown i go tomorrow. Third time this weekkkkkkk.

30 Day Meme: Day 2 & 3

im sorry. im really bad at keeping up. haha
Read the intro to this: here
___________________________________________________________________

Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years

10 years is a really long time to consider seeing i've been currently living day by day, week by week. i try not to think so far which is not very wise but that's the current mode i am in. In ten years i shall be 33/34 and hopefully by then i would have had an established career in a field that I can devote myself to and a job i am passionate about. Preferably somewhere along the lines of design....weddings....publishing....layouts....things like that! Obviously my dream is to be paid a ridiculous amount to blog (about weddings) but at the moment i feel like i'm not entertaining enough to do so lol and its a stiff competition market like any of the other industry i want to enter.

It's very hard to picture where i will be in 10 years because i'm currently going through that "trying to find myself" "trying to find my passion" stage so anything can change. If you asked me the same question 10 years ago i would have probably given a completely different answer. I don't know what the "30"s consists of when i barely know what to expect in the next five years. I would like by this age to have at least traveled to Asia and Europe.

I do hope by that age though i would have at leastttttt finally met "that" person. But that's me being optimistic. hahaha. I might have to give lavalife a try if by 34 i have yet to meet anybody : ( lolllllllllll

Regardless of what age l am at, i want to be happy and be surrounded by the people that means the most to me. 

Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

AH. hahaha. This is an interesting one. What are MY views on drugs and alcohol. lol Lets start off with what people perceive as my favorite beverage (next to starbucks), alcohol. Since i am apparently an alcoholic to most people, clearly i do not think there is anything wrong with alcohol. That said i do have a problem with people not knowing their limits and drinking until they're puking their dinner, lunch and breakfast out. The purpose of drinking is to enhance the "fun-ness" of the particular event/occasion.....not to get plastered to the point of blacking out. That kids, is no fun. I also don't believe in drinking yourself to death when you're depressed/sad. You're actually much worst off when intoxicated and sad at the same time. It actually doesn't take away the pain as most people think, in fact it amplifies it (take it from someone who was a sad emo when i first started drinking). Contrary to most people's belief that i am an alcoholic- i am just a really easy-going (i won't decline a drink) social drinker that can hold her a drink a little bit more than most Asian girls. I'm NOT a tank, i'm not a machine. It just seems that way because i don't get the Asian flush and also because i am bigger than most typical China dolls, so holding that much amount of liquid is an easy job. But really i am just as weak as any girl.

I always say, "Drink for the buzz, not for the hangover" and i think anybody who drinks should aim for that and not be abusive about it. That of course is just my opinion. What do i know right?

As for drugs i don't really have much opinion on it so this is going to be short. The more serious shit (coke, dust, etc) is obviously for the fucked-up. It kills people. That's what i have to say about that. Nothing further. The more widely-used drugs (weed and smokes) is where i take a neutral stand on. I don't frown at people when they take hits around me nor do i tell people to stop smoking. That said though, i have never tried smoking because i promised my dad that i wouldn't. It's people's choice to smoke and who am i to tell them to stop. Besides, i hang around far too many people that smokes to do anything about it lol

This entire rant is completely biased because clearly i am exposed to both drug and alcohol usage situations so i really don't think anybody should take me seriously lol

LOL

Me challenging Kay is like a retarded kid challenging someone with an IQ of 200.
-E, BBM Discussion.

LOLOL. I love GCM.
An actual entry tomorrow!

fffound

its the Iron Man 2 (Tony Stark) Mark V Briefcase!!!!!

if i was a guy i would be up all over this.

im not a guy and im pretty excited looking at it. SOOOOOO awesomeeeeee. sexy and shiny. i likey!!!

its unfortunate that it costs 400 bucks haha i can't even have it as a toy.

fffound + GASPS want.

i want this workspace. fuk.

from the macbook to the imac, to the tablet, to the PRINTER (god i want/need a printer), to the pretty decor to the old fashion camera on the right. 

i wanttttttttttttt.

30 Day Meme: Day 1

Enjoy entry # 1 of 30 Day Meme. Read the intro to this it: here
___________________________________________________________________

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

I like how this "project" starts off with this topic. Really sets the mood doesn't it? lol Anyways to answer the obvious question/topic the single life is interesting. It has its ups and obviously its downs. It's much different this time around. The single life this time around has made me become more aware of many things. When I was single at 20/21, all i wanted to do was party (not saying that, that is not what i want to do) and did not care about responsibilities aside from needing to cover my own ass financially. Three years later the single life is so much more than that at 23.

I would say the biggest part of being single, is cherishing solitude, friendship and yourself. The single life this time around made me realize how important a social life (away from a boyfriend) is and how it is important to not neglect your friends. The one thing I learned is to not let the other person consume ur life. It was a mistake to treat a relationship like it was a commited marriage when it really should never have been like that.

Obviously the single life is fun, especially for someone like me and those that know me well enough would know that i am seriously not just bumming around hoping for things to happen. I am on the move and on the go (except on days when its rainy and my hair is a mess).

That said, the single life is not about moving onto/reattaching yourself with anyone. I know a friend who has pretty much never been single and it is the last thing i want right now. Sure, many things makes me sad and lonely. Specific holidays, events, places and things. Even sitting in my own room is devastating sometimes. But it's not a time of self-pity but of self-improvement, self-learning and finding yourself and what truly makes "you" happy. Know what your mistakes were and do not repeat them.

The truth is i slip. All the time. I'm blogging about how being single should be all about being content, independent and proud but i also cannot ignore the brutality and shitty sharp painful aspect that the single life also brings. I know that its okay to slip but i also know the important thing is to get back right up and bitch mode that face immediately before anybody else notices. 

"Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you’re pretty, sexy, and you’re taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.”
- Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City

I know that when i least expect it, it will come. Like how it did three years ago.

i know it will be fabulous and blissful...again.

And when it does, being single will pay off....as much as it sucks balls sometimes.

30 Day Meme

Last month was Project 30 Day where each day i loaded a different photograph depending on what the topic was. I found that to be fun (and a great way to maintain a 30 day readership level haha) and i found something the other day in my blogroll that is a similar idea to that project but instead of loading a photograph, each day i will be blogging about a certain topic listed in the box below. I think it would be interesting to see what i'll come up with because a couple of the topics are pretty "deep". It may be the 5th of October today but im going to start with day 01 (just because i want to) and end it a couple days into November which works out PERFECTLY because day 30's topic is the highs and lows of the month and i can use the couple of days in November to summarize the month of October. Normally for me October is a month of many traditions but this year its the month of transitions. I think that should be pretty blog-worthy.

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 04 - Your views on religion.
Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.
Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 08 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.
Day 13 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
Day 15 - Your favorite tumblrs.
Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20 - How important you think education is.
Day 21 - One of your favorite shows.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.
Day 24 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27 - A problem that you have had.
Day 28 - Something that you miss.
Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month

Enjoy October people!