The most important thing I realized is that painful breakups, unrequited love, shitty jobs and the like help us to BUILD CHARACTER and that no matter how bad it feels, we are much better off because of it. Sometimes you have to stand alone to make sure you can. Forget what you want to remember what you deserve.You may not end up where you thought you'd be, but you'll always end up where you were meant to be. You can either let these bad things, define you, destroy you or strengthen you. Fight through it like a warrior. Greater things are to come.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


nos·tal·gi·a (n-stlj, n-) n.
A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.

I originally wrote this a couple of days ago but never got around to publishing/finishing it until this sudden blogging urge i have right now at 2am-ish when i REALLLY should be asleep to get up at 8ish for tomorrow. Anyways i had to go back and change all my tenses to past tenses because all recent events are now PAST recent events. & l'll probably be jumping back and forth. Forgive me if i dont make sense. Kickboxing really tired me out tonight.
Come back for pretty pictures and possibly better edited/structured thoughts tomorrow. My brain is mush and my thighs are on fire from having the laptop on it for over an hour.

First and foremost, i must rant about futbol. Just because it has taken over my life and has become almost like a full-time job. Seriously, watching futbol is takes up so much damn time that i do jacksquat in between. That said after when futbol is done, i gym (or at least attempt to) or i watch true blood. Just like that the day is over!!!

The other day i headed out to watch both the Brazi vs. Portugal game and the Spain vs. Chile game with a friend i havnt seen since the Wex days. In other words that means six years. I love the World Cup- it bonds and reunites people! That was unexpected fun. Its always more fun to watch the game with friends than by yourself and with a mother who doesn't know anyone except Beckham (who isnt even in playing!!!! haha) and kaka (because his name is easy to remember) and the lang jai (hottie) that fell from Spain (Torres). My mother is so silly.

A small rant about the ENG vs GERMANY game. One word. Brutal. It was painfully brutal to see them be humiliated and defeated like that. Wayne Rooney, i love you, you big tubby Ogre but you seriously disappointed me and the rest of the world.

I still love Lampard (picture) and Gerrand though. I am sad that their "Golden Era" (Lampard, Gerrand, Terry) ended on this low note....but nonetheless they will remain legendary in my books. I still love you England!!!! But there goes my shirt. I hope i dont outgrow it (cough become fat) in four years. EFF.

Look at how kind he is to kids. So lovable.

I still remain convinced that the Refs are bribed and are out to get Kaka (i.e. Yellow cards passed out like candy) and Torres (having people STEP on his injured leg) eliminated. Terrible, crook people!!!! Just because they are good looking doesn't make them dangerous. I also don't care what anybody else says about them being useless. Its very hard to be THAT good looking and talented at the same time. People ought to give them a break. 

Since my beloved ENG is kicked out. I have redirected my energy and will be channeling it towards Torres and Kaka (Spain & Brazil respectively). Spain vs. Portugal game tomorrow!!!!! Going to be uber excitinggggg.
Okay. I got that all off my chest. Now that futbol is done. Moving on.

This weekend i actually ventured downtown to club for R's bday. To be more specific and dramatic, i went on Saturday night which was the day of all the crazy G20 riot. Yeah i really think everybody in the limo had a death wish or something because we were heading almost towards the heart of the war zone. It wasn't the smartest thing to do but we did it anyways- with style and alcohol.

Just a side note about the G20 protests- talk about Toronto being UNDER PREPARED. My gosh. All the shit that happened!! People flying out of maholes??! Torching Cop Cars!?!? Fucking Insane.

Heart. Crying.

Many of you may find this to be completely hilarious- but i have to admit that when i saw the protesters smash the windows of the Starbucks(SSS) on heart actually hurt a tiny bit. MAN FAK YOU CRAZY RIOTERS. I bet HALF OF YOU drink their expensive-ass coffee so i don't see a point in destroying them when you will probably go back to where ever you are from and order a tall iced coffee in a grande cup with extra ice, 3 pumps hazelnut syrup, 2 pumps classic, an inch of non-fat milk, with a dome lid and an accompanying venti (not tall) straw to relax yourself from a day of successfully  DESTROYING and ATTACKING everything in sight.

The video for this picture is actually here.
If i was the cops i would whip these guys so hard with my extendo.
And what's a G20 protest without a random Asian and our winner pose.

That is all. I digress. Back to my crazy night.

The club that we went to was actually really decent, the crowd wasn't too Unionville-ish/Bayview-like, no pushy people, and they even fed us munchy sandwiches and cupcakes?!?!? That was a definite (pleasant) first. I also ran into a friend that i've also known since grade 7 and again not seen in 6 years. It was extremely nice to be able to experience kind of like a blast from the past moments twice in a week. I enjoyed myself very, VERY much. The music was superb and i was buzzed enough to not feel my feet. Big smiles. i hope R had a wonderful birthday evening.

Let's just linger on a topic for a bit. The definition i have at the beginning of this entry was the mood i was in when i was typing this. As i've mentioned, i met up and bumped into two people of my past and it made me decide to try something one evening after dinner. I was feeling really nostalgic and in particular it was my kind of post-Wex and Pre-GCM days that surfaced. Lately i've gotten into a habit of taking after dinner strolls by my lomeself and that evening i decided to go down this route that meant a lot to me. It was a route that i took with a certain individual 6 years ago and I haven't gone on that path since because i was too scared of what i would feel. I guess since i was reminiscing the past, it made me want to see what it would feel like to take that route again this many years later. Anyways i took that walk and expected myself to feel...sad i guess. I lingered, stopped and sat at that very spot expecting to be sad when instead i felt really peaceful. It was nice to be able to think back and just smile and be thankful. What happened 6 years ago was key example to how i shouldn't live life after a breakup. 6453 meant the world to me at the time. And for a very long time after that. Something that very little people would not understand. Then i was able to let that go for someone that brought bliss into my life. Which leads to my next point- Sitting there also made me think of a lot of recent events, and i was able to conclude one thing. That time does heal all. Walking down that path was living proof to what i thought was an impossible type of pain that i will have to live with for the rest of my life. The type that i was fearful of....but does not exist anymore. It gave me a sense of relief and a little bit of reassurance, that one day it just won't hurt anymore. The tears will stop. I think more than anything right now that's all i need, a constant reminder that one day.....the heart will stop aching.

I apologize for going so boring and emo. I also hate blogging about 6453 because that topic is so 2004. But I haven't incriminate myself like that in so long and i needed that outlet before i bug the shit out of twin or bestest about it.

Moving on.

Random (SHORT) thoughts because its 230am and i need sleep:

  • I'm getting fat again. I needdddd to step it up with the kickboxing and time spent at goodlife....and stop eating Egg Benedicts.
  • Tomorrow i am going to go pick up my fuckking 400 dollars retainers. I am going to march in there and be snooty and bitchy to the people and never going back. I'm sorry lx. i failed you. I grant permission for you to scowl at me the next time you see me.
  • I just finished watching a TVB drama and it was like watching my life being acted out by really good looking actors and actresses. I was soooo devastated. But luckily for them, TVB always gives them a nice happy ending. Me on the other hand is not so lucky. Fml. 
  • I got myself into a "dilemma" (two actually) and i have no idea how the fuck to get out. Argh. I need a hit man to terminate certain individuals. Or a brainwash device. Either way i need them to disappear. Please go away.
Wow. okay. i think that's enough of a read?
I'll probably be editing this with pictures (of hot men) and other accompanying visual "references" (if any) during the day tomorrow because right now, 256AM is my limit. I am an old lady.




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