The most important thing I realized is that painful breakups, unrequited love, shitty jobs and the like help us to BUILD CHARACTER and that no matter how bad it feels, we are much better off because of it. Sometimes you have to stand alone to make sure you can. Forget what you want to remember what you deserve.You may not end up where you thought you'd be, but you'll always end up where you were meant to be. You can either let these bad things, define you, destroy you or strengthen you. Fight through it like a warrior. Greater things are to come.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Embracing Nature- Part Un

I can't wait to get away from the city.

From everything.

I think aside from the no pinning/txting part, I can't wait to be away from the internet. It has hurt me enough times this week. Who knew blogs and facebooks can ruin lives. The irony is that i am the social media whore around here.

Anyways. Leaving in a few hours.

Cross fingers. Wish me good luck in my battle with the mosquitoes and everything else.


Stabbed (in the neck)
To dream that you have been stabbed, signifies your struggle with power. You are experiencing feelings of inadequacy and defensiveness. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are feeling betrayed as reflected by the popular phrase, "being stabbed in the back".

To dream that your neck is injured or sore, indicates a separation between your heart and mind. There is a literal disconnect between how you feel and what you think. You are feeling conflicted.

To dream that you are wounded by a knife, is symbolic of masculine or animalistic aggression.
(Probably my anger.)

Stuck in a wave
To see muddy or dirty water in your dream, indicates that you are wallowing in your negative emotions. You may need to take some time to cleanse your mind and find internal peace. Alternatively, the dream suggests that your thinking/judgment is unclear and clouded. If you are immersed in muddy water, then it indicates that you are in over your head in a situation and are overwhelmed by your emotions.

To see a tidal wave in your dream, represents an overwhelming emotional issue that demands your attention. You may have been keeping your feelings and negative emotions bottled up inside for too long.

The 6453 dreams are beginning again...
Its becoming kind of like a haunting now.

Thursday, July 29, 2010


how did i know? i knew it.

I fucking knew it.

That burns. Really, really fucking badly.

i think you people ought to just fucking finish me off.

i can only take so much of these uber sensitive stunts.



New Layout Coming Soon
Hopefully it will be loaded and complete before i go away for the weekend.

Btw. I did NOT have a pleasant dream/sleep last night.
Good Nights!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Good Night Sleep

Tom and Summer makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

May i fall asleep in peace and dream a dreamless dream tonight. Tis' a brand new day tomorrow.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010


I rewatched the movie and discovered a new-found love.

Dreamt of what i feared most. It was like a million knives to the heart and more. 個種想死的感覺.
I'm horrid that its my actual reality. With some parts emphasized (because my subconscious is so dramatic).
I hope this does not become reocurring

I lied

Sorry. I said l'll add onto my last blog entry but i totally lost that buzz overnight.

I found this Inception Timeline that i think many would find interesting 

Random thoughts:

  • The new week begins and to punish myself for a weekend of bad eating i doubled my time working out and did about a total of 3.5 hours of Combat, Kettlebell and Muay Thai. Day 1 done, 4 more to go this week.   
  • Today must have been "Hot Asian Guys with hot faces and hot bods" Day at the Gym.
    I wish it was like that every day.
  • Camp trip #1 at the end of the week. Going to be funnn timesssss. 
  • I need to find a site where i can stream football games. The Premier league and LFP is starting soon!!!
  • Employment Insurance Where are you? : (((
Oh and i am okay today. If anybody wants to know.

Night night!

Monday, July 26, 2010

Inception & More

ENTRY NOT COMPLETE. COME BACK FOR ADD-ONs to the ending of this entry.... tomorrow. I just want to let the Monday morning readers to have something to read at work tomorrow morning haha. See how considerate i am.


Here goes my super machine-gun-typing blogging tendencies. This is going to be long.

You've been warned.

I went into the movie Inception completely misled by A regarding what the movie was about. I knew that the movie was about Leo having the ability to go into other people's dreams to steal information. The part i was misled though was that i was told that he was going to go into a psychopath's dream thus the drama and scary stuff is suppose to happen. As i was explaining to the boys after the movie, i was waiting for clowns with knives to jump out any second to attack Leo but that certainly did NOT happen. Argh. lol I also did not watch ANY trailers of this movie so i walked into the theater with no knowledge of what to expect aside from the little preview synopsis i read.

The movie was pretty amazing. As i said in one of my last entries, I could relate to it in its entirety. Behind all the crazy, exciting suspenseful scenes with the sexy Leonardo DiCaprio and super hot Joseph-Gordon Levitt (who i am now terribly in love with now), the movie is about exploring your subconscious. It is about understanding the undeniable power we have to manage our subconscious. This is one part i can relate to. For as long as I can remember, i have always felt a connection with my dreams and also my interest in dreams is no surprise to anyone that comes by this blog and to those who has known me since Junior High (remember my Speech Arts topic on Decoding Dreams??? That ALMOST won me an award??haha) would remember me being really into the whole Astrology/Dreams thing. I also remember my mom telling me that when I was younger i would describe my dreams to her in perfect detail and she would be a little freaked out especially when I was sick (I was sick very often as a kid) because my dreams became a tad bit strange whenever I was burning up or something. I guess because I've been so in-tuned with my dreams that over the years I have successfully managed to train my mind to do a lot of things when "unconscious" i guess. This is part of the "power" that I am referring to up there ^. I now am successfully able to:

  • Remember all of my reoccurring dreams and its details
  • Details of dreams in general
  • Change the endings to my dreams
    i would be able to wake up momentarily (i find myself to be inbetween the state of conscious and unconsciousness) and fall back asleep again to the same dream but change the ending depending on how i want it to end.
  • Continue where i end off in a dream if i was to be awaken suddenly
  • Fall asleep in my dream
It's quite weird but its definitely something i take pride in. I believe very deeply in decoding symbols and imagery in dreams because it is your subconscious's way of sending a message to the conscious mind which is why I do massive research/decoding on my dreams after I wake up. Even in the movie they said when we are conscious, only a fraction of our brain is working but when we are asleep our brain is pretty much on steroids and can process every minor detail that we overlook in our over complicating, busy lives.

A line from the movie stood out to me very much:

Never recreate from your memory. You won't be able to differentiate a dream from a memory...

Again, a personal relation to the line. A lot of my dreams are based on memories and the waking life. I find these to be the worst dreams to have, when its like you are watching a movie of your life- whether it be happy or sad, they hurt the most. Especially when you know it will always be a dream. My personal experience, i have been tortured by the same theme of dreams for a long time (ahhh 6-7 years? I still have them now). In the earlier years, those dreams caused insomnia and a lot of stress on myself. I would wake up with my pillowcase being soaked from crying in my sleep and would feel like I havn't slept because i would feel heavy from the sleep. I would then continue on to cursing my life and bitch about why God must take my only salvation (which was to sleep and forget about my pain but instead cause more pain by allowing me to dream certain things) away from me. I think it was when i finally confronted the situation 4 years ago, that now when i do have those type of dreams i am able to embrace that fantasy once more- which again will always just be a dream like so many other things now.

Yeah i know i am doing my vague-confusing-i-don't-know-what-you-are-referencing-to-rant again.

Another line from the movie:

I miss you more than I can bear, but we had our time together, and it was great. But now I must let you go.

I totally sobbed during that part when Leo said that (I hope the boys didn't notice). The movie was about 90% done and all the personal relations was really overwhelming lol The movie too, was about Leo confronting his past and his fears. There was also the reoccurring question- Can we live in a dream forever? If you can live in a dream forever, would you? It goes back to one's interpretation of what a perfect dream is.The movie ended in a way where its rather open-ended. I think the interpretation of  a person's "perfect dream" would differentiate their view of what the ending of movie really is.

OKAY. So in the midst of all that, IN CONCLUSION/BOTTOM LINE: Inception is one of the best movies i have ever watched. Do not be turned off by the reviews saying how confusing it is. Just go and watch, it will fall together into place at the end....sorta.

ANDDD i just HAD to throw that in because he is SO EFFNG HOT. I would like to sit on his lap.Fan please.

I hope you guys enjoyed that. Because there's more random thoughts coming up.

First off. My previous entry was very, very emo. That is not to say that I am emo though. Just, a little upset, hurt and that much more bitter and disappointed lol That said though; 我讀人的blog, 發覺自己其實很強. I guess i am actually in fact quite...strong(er) comparatively when it comes to handling my emotions now. I could be a lot worst but im not. I think people should give me a little bit more credit. Its a struggle every single effing day but i am soldiering it the best i can by doing two things. (1) 我逼自己不好想起你/我們的回憶. If that fails (2)我同自己說殘yun的真相 which is- 他以經忘了你, 他生活dut好好, 和大可能有第二個 x repeat. Breathe. Steady. And then l'll be good and go on with my day. It hurts a bit less each time after i tell myself that. I've been pretty awesome, if i would say so myself.

Okay next! I had my first Summerlicious with the GCM girls this weekend.

The food was terrible but as always, i love catching up with them. I would continue to blog. [ Actually i will be back tomorrow to add onto this ] but my head has started to hurt and its 2am.

I WILL BE BACK. I apologize for the bad bad grammer.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Bitter Realization

Word of advice to people: Loving someone too much will fuck you in the ass at the end of the day and you will end up with no one.

Solution: Just don't effing love!!! You end up with nobody anyways so what's the point of giving your all.

Do i sense major commitment issues in the future? (Yes).

God you learn SO much from reading someone's blog.

- - -

原來一直以來, 他覺得壓力很大因為我太愛他.
自己決定我們的過去三年的回憶和感情可以gumgum去... 沒有給我一個機會去改...機會知道是怎麼回事

原來一直是我的錯...我終於知道, 問題是我.

今日,我發現我是一個不適合去愛的人. 我很笨.

包括個一個我覺得是..我的終於找到屬於我happy ending的人.


& this is why i officially do not believe anymore because i don't know how.

I am fine.

But that's my reality.

I will be back with an Inception/weekend-related post ~ I'm in a major blogging mode.

Saturday, July 24, 2010


I am in currently in MAJOR blogging mode despite that its 3:50am and i got to be up in the morning to run errands and then get ready to go out to meet some people at different times.


Earlier (much much earlier actually) I watched Inception with the boys and like real hardcore geeks, we ended up having almost a 2 hour post-movie analysis/breakdown of the movie and its ideology. And then another hour and a half on random movie subjects. The one of many things that i absolutely love about these boys, is that we can talk about anything for literally hourssss at a time. This movie is a great example of a topic that we completely challenged from beginning til the end.

The movie itself was terrific. I think for me it was extra great and well-made because I was able to relate to the movie theme because I am a dream analyst and have trained myself in different ways when it comes to remembering/continuing/stopping/creating my dreams.

I think l'll add on to this entry later after i get some sleep because i have SOOOO much to say on this topic and others.

Summerlicious with the girls tomorrow!!!

I will be back on Sunday with something long to read- you mark my words. lol

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Why i want to go to Comic Con

I spent almost a day making this. You people better like it.


Aside from wanting to go to the first Starbucks in Seattle and of course Disney World and Disney Land IN Paris, and Paris itself. I'm adding two more destinations.

  • Comic Con, San Diego
    (that is if it hasn't moved itself yet...there's rumors that Comic Con has outgrown San Diego and might relocate for 2011 since its contract is expiring...) 
  • Brazil 2014 for the 20th Fifa World Cup.
Technically. I have about four years to save up for Brazil and another 2-5 years to do it before i outgrow it even though i don't think i will EVER outgrow what goes on at that event so there's really no time restraint. Only money restraint.

MMMMMMMMMMMMM Comics/Scifi/Fantasy and Football. My guilty pleasures.

Who's in!?!?!

Anyways. I'm working on a "Why i want to go to Comic Con" piece.
Come back later tonight!!!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Brother Sister

It's so nice to have like a friend that is like your younger brother to be around when you have no one else to talk to, and turn to. Especially one that you've known since you were five.

It's like having TWO younger brothers (one by default...i mean blood haha and one by choice) !

Thnx Junior for always listening to me rant and proving time after time that maybe you should be the older sibling lol because you are clearly much more mature, methodical and smarter than i am & seems like you are the one looking out for me! Thnx thnx.

Monday, July 19, 2010

heart crying

When i grow up. I want to marry an international football hunk.


Sunday, July 18, 2010

i ate too many cupcakes today.

1 9268 2 343.

1 9474 968 5639.

1 9474 968 78455 56833 63.



Today was a pleasant beach day with the cousin and K, minus the crazy sand that whipped us across our bare skin. Tanning was complete fail. So was the camera whoring task we set out to do but failed to do. I did however, discovered that i love Sour Cream a little bit way too much and i successfully refrained myself from eating any of Paul the Octopus's generations (while the girls savoured their calamari). haha

One topic in particular came up, was the topic of how fast the summer has gone by.
For me its been particularly fast given recent events and as well the World Cup totally made time zoomed by.  Can you believe that it was a month!?!? It felt like only 2 weeks!

And just a note on that subject. I am experiencing some mad World Cup withdraw and to compensate for that, i've been watching Fernando Torres' Videos on Youtube for hours...its getting a bit overwhelming.

I digress from the topic that everyone hates. lol

There's 2 weeks left in July and then August, the last month of Summer which i always tend to try to make it end off with a smash to welcome September- the working month. I think this year's autumn/winter will be particularly hard for me to endure. Lots of things to think about, more holidays to not look forward to, certain dates that are not to be celebrated anymore, more time stuck in the house because it will be getting colder. I'm hoping to make the best of whatever that's left of the summer and hope to god that i will have many things to distract me and keep me busy when the dreaded working month arrives.

Goodies to look forward to:

  • Summerlicious with the GCM Girls
  • To hopefully watch Inception with the boys
  • Camping x 2
    I'm trying to sneak in a 2nd trip. Hopefully the days do not collide! That said, one would be in Tobermory (Cabins) and the other Algonquin (tents?!?) somewhere? Who knows. We'll see what happens. If it does work out tho, it will probably be back to back weekends of embracing nature at its finest.
  • Rams Birthday Cruise
    THE party of the year. I've been looking forward to this for the entire year. It is going to be effing epicccc again. Last year was amazing, i think this year will probably top less. Mark my words!!!! Must find epic dress and shoes to go with epic night.
  • Elementary School Reunion (maybe)
    Today i received an FB event invite for a reunion with people that i probably have not seen in 12 years? I've actually always envisioned what it would be like to have this type of reunion but i never thought someone would actually take the initiative to organize it. It's quite weird thinking about it now but would be pretty interesting if most of the people i talked to in grade 4-6 would be there. I am REALLY hoping bestest and another friend (or 2) will go so i have someone to talk to. Mainly though i hope bestest can go. Kind of to show people that after all these years we still tight. hehe : )
  • Long weekend Niagra trip with the Girls
    Pretty much Montreal again. pwahahha. i am tres excited.
Yeps. Lets end this summer with a bang shall we?

Saturday, July 17, 2010


I dunno why but this made me smile.
Guess it reminded me of happy stuff.
Happy stuff should always be remembered though.

Despite all.


Friday, July 16, 2010

2011 are you here yet

Bought a 2011 agenda earlier this evening while out with C.
I can't wait to fill it out (even though its only July).
I'm done with 2010. I started it with a lucky streak but its just been the shits since.

今年一開始,希望是不應該給我. 這個希望是令我相信今年將是一個好年.
結果現時,所有的事很很殘忍gum走. 我仍然很迷惑,很亂. 不明白為什麼會發生.
說不定是我的房的風水不好 也許明年我應該放缸魚, 可以幫一幫我防護殺氣 hahah

I want the year to be over. To be behind me.

Tummy hurts. I think that 3rd Starbucks did it.
I blame the barista (not a very smart cookie mind' you)  for pouring literally every thing that was left in that iced coffee pitcher .....including the crud at the bottom and scraping it with her long spoons (what was there to scrape?!!?). The worst part was that i was STILL jipped because it was not at all filled to the top. Sighs. Thinking about it makes me/my tummy upset.


Another one i found. I'm sooo into this. 

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

I want black handwraps

My palms are raw, hands are shaking, my thighs and quads are BURNING, my shoulders and biceps are sore, my arms smell from the sweaty pads that literally everyone shares, i smell like sweat in combination with odor de la skunk (from the drive home lol). On top of all, i got k/o'ed by a big black girl tonight.

But i am loving every damn minute of ittttt.

Must tell myself to keep this momentum up. Because hard work pays off.

Isn't that picture up there so efffing scary tho?!?!? (I guess only people who are into Sci-Fi or know the Aliens/Predator/AVP movies would know what i'm talking about) Its like a bodybuilder woman....but she's a BODY BUILDER-WOMAN-PREDATOR. Creeeepy.  hahaha Loves it ~ Though i would NOT want to see her at the gym.

Packed weekend! I am tres excited.

One Day

One day l'll make it there. (Paris, France that is)

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Butch vs. Polite ~ 粗魯對斯文

As i bused home today from Combat, a good dozen of these 斯文 (see mun)(poe-lite, delicate-looking) girls came on. Obviously because i live across the 53 line i see a million of these girls a week. I would describe these girls as (asian) pretty-looking, feminine, hair done, hair in place, pale-skin, petite, pretty clothes and large doll-like eyes with blue/purple/green contacts on. I'll even go ahead and can assume they all are soft-spoken and have really sweet anime-like voices.

(Barf) Argh. I hate those type of girls.

Seeing all these girls today got me thinking of something that the bestest and i have discussed before, which was whether guys are attracted to girls that are polite/斯文 and are extremely feminine or is it all in the personality, even if the girl is a bit more butch/粗魯. I believe that bestest and i attempted to be polite/斯文 for a day and it was just down right DIFFICULT to lower our voices when we speak, to be more feminine and even swear less. haha thinking about it now it was just outrageous for us to even try. It's just not in my nature. lol

That said it kind of sucks for us (well me, not her because shes taken lol) because it seems like the majority of guys are really into that type of girls. It sucks in particular for me because i am such a giant....that wears glasses and laughs loudly all the time...completely opposite of these China Dolls! So i dunno, guys do you actually prefer China Dolls or is a girl being a little butch but totally fun more attractive? Be honest. I personally think for any guy, they would all prefer a sweet little girl. Who wouldn't want something sweet right? Even my mom perfers that. She thinks i'm a big loud boy with boy-like tendencies. Now that im single, she is pro-me turning into a princess. (Gag) She mentioned on several occasions that i should tone it (my personality!?!?) down or else i'll never be able to find a boyfriend (again) if i don't start acting lady-like. Actually she has always felt that i was a boy even when i was taken and was shocked that the than-mister was able to accept my manly behaviors. (Very funny. But true) In fact, she recently disclosed to me that she thinks im turning into an alcoholic but that's a different story for a different day haha. Alcoholism is a big no-no and definitely not lady-like hahah.

Anyways. That's just a small thought that came about during my ride on the non-ac/ed bus ~

Off topic now-

I concluded something tonight. Something i cant hold off anymore.





.........ARGHHHHH. My current ones are scratched up beyond imaginable. They are SO bad, that even color/vision now more fuzzy/disoriented because the scratched-up-ness. SOBSSS. That's going to be another 400 gone, due to my ridiculous blinded eye sight. Please take me glasses shopping K.

& A just informed me that my beloved Michael Owen and his Manchester U team is coming this Friday for a match at the Rogers Center. I'm on a hunt for tickets but i really doubt l'll be able to find anything decent. Sighs. I really want to see Michael Owen....sighs sighs sighs. Wait til Barcelona or Real Madrid come to town.....those are the big guns im waiting for!!!! <3 Futbol.

Continue to hunt hunt hunt!!!!


I have a current huge fascination with tattoos. Especially on the arm.
Thats uber sexy, don't you think. Not too big, but very captivating. 
Artist/Calligrapher: Betsey Dunlop

Jot-Down Thoughts

I suddenly feel like blogging but too lazy to write in paragraphs...& i'm also preoccupied by also doing my nails and having my weekly fix of True Blood all while having this blogging urge. So jot-down thoughts again.

  • I will never, EVER order clothes from a China/Korean/Taiwan website AGAIN.
    The measurements are never correct. They LIEEEE. It says one thing, the article of clothing says something completely different. Sadly unlike all the petite China dolls (living in the Greater Toronto area) i am unable to fit mostly LENGTH-wise because i am taller than all of you pretty girls. My boob-area, is sadly your head. All your dresses are shirts for me and shirts becomes bras. Therefore- clothes made IN and being SOLD from a China-ran clothing website will never compliment me because i'm such a giant. Pouts. Being a tall Asian sucks. A 70 dollars lesson learnt. 
  • Kickboxing, kickboxing, kickboxingAnybody interested in joining? Every referral i get this month (or something like that), i receive free boxing gloves!!! In return l'll take you out for dinner and you get a "healthy" lifestyle. Tonight's class was epic. I almost killed my cousin. ...............Hahah nah not even close (thnx god lol) My kicks are oh so weak and my left arm is even weaker. Must continue jabs tomorrow during combat. 
  • Beast Mode
    Not much about it except keeping it up. Kettlebell, Kickboxing, Pump, Combat, Hot Yoga. Repeat. Hopefully l'll see results in a months time. I really just gotta find myself some post-workout snacks because i get so hungry afterwards. 
  • Starbucks fix
    I am trying to cut back. Yeah...i know that's quite a bold statement to make. Coming from me. Wish me good luck.
  • New Asian music
    This is the fob side of me talking. But i REALLY need some updated Chinese/Mando music. I'm getting really bored of my "on repeats" list that consists of just some "newer" TVB theme songs (which some don't even consider as music!!!). Help please someone.
  • Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
    In the midst of rereading the book again and honest to book can ever take the place of Harry Potter. I think i want to be buried with my books. Its the 10th time? 12th time rereading it? It just keeps on exciting me beyond anything imaginable. I sound a little crazy. I blame the toxic fumes in my icebox room.
  • Robbery
    Tomorrow marks the 3rd installment of 4 IOUs to my damn ortho office. Let me just say....that retainers are damn expensive and losing them 3 times is very unwise....and expensive. Especially when you're unemployed. I hate the dental industry. Jerks are robbing me poor. My kid is either going to grow up to be a futbol player or a dentist. Depending on the race obviously. ha ha ha ha.
Okay i would actually continue but the nail polish fumes is making my hurt a little.

Tomorrow shall be email people back/beastmode/fold & organize my clothes day.

Repeat phrase of the day: It is what it Is.

Monday, July 12, 2010

My Promise to You

Right i forgot to add,

that l will be going on a tentacle-creatures detox diet for the next four years because of Paul the Awesome Octopus. He successfully predicted that Spain will take home the cup and because that just means oh-so-effing much to me, i said that i l'll refrain from eating his kind until the next World Cup in 2014 if they do in fact win. And you know, THEY DID WIN. haha Meaning no squid and no octopus (even though its not exactly something i have every day for dinner) for the next FOUR years. No calamari, no little squids for hot pot/dimsum/kbbq, no squid pieces in chow meins and noodles.  Nothinggggggg.

And that's my promise.

Sunday, July 11, 2010



i will be back after a nap.

Okay i am back.

So yesterday i got completely shitfaced @ J's bbq and as a result of that- i had the worst hangover ive had since last labour day long weekend clubbing which in turn.....caused me to stay home to watch the final game. Yes. I actually stayed home because i was way too hungover to even remotely move my head, let alone travel out to watch it as i was suppose to. i cant believe myself and i was so angry that i couldnt be w/ the cousin and the boys or with A or J dt where the excitement was. I have no one to blame but myself so i do deserve it. I should have ate ALOT more and i refuse to drink again until J's birthday jam in August. I'm still pissed at myself.



My boys are the shitsssss!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow the game was so effing intense, damn dutches (douches as i call them) and their dirty playings. The game is FOOTBALL, not karate. There's no one to blame but yourself for your loss. Even though Spain did have their diving moments which pissed me off too. Seriously, get down, get back up and don't be a pansy. Iker Casillas was seriously god in disguise in that stadium because the man pulled off SO MANY spectacular saves and flew in pretty much every direction the ball did. I was pretty much in tears when they received the cup. I am SO proud of them!!! They made history tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOLD YOU PEOPLE THE OCTOPUS IS RIGHT!!!!! I cannot wait for them to open their envelopes and disclose what they wrote down!!!!! I blogged about that here.

The kick that hurt my heart. haha

The Man of the Match. You are my hero Iker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was REALLY happy that Torres got a chance to come out. Even though i REALLY wanted a Eurocup deja vu to happen again (where Torres scored the only winning goal), it was better then nothing being an assist to Iniesta's winning goal!!!! That said though, i felt terrible that he pulled a hamstring near the end of the game and nobody seemed to noticed him as he layed there like a body bag again : ( I was like screaming on my couch for someone to go help my poor hunk!!!! He also tripped like 1 minute into playing. He's so clumsy tehehehe.

Look at that uberly homo-bromance going on here. I loves it. 
They're both so beautiful. Yes, you too Sergio Ramos.You have a rather beautiful nose.

Awards that were given:

  • Iker Casillas for Golden Glove (Well Deserved!!!!!!!!)
  • Uruguay's Diego Forlan Wins Golden Ball (With David Villa coming in for Silver!!)
  • Germany's Thomas Mueller Takes Young Player Award & Golden Boot
  • David Villa for Best Tournament Player
Sweeeeeeeeeeeetttt. Spain took away most of the awards!!!

And yeah. I guess that's the end of the World Cup. Just like that the month of epicness is over and i have to wait another four years. I'm REALLY considering a trip to Brazil for the 2014 Tournament. Hopefully by then l'll be rich enough to do so. Afterall, i WILLLL be 27 when the next round comes around.....bleh. lol It's been a terrific tournament. I guess i would say the only HUGE disappointment was of England's much early departure and Brazil's untimely departure. Both titan teams that i expected to be in top-notch failed to meet expectations. That's also the same for all the "Star" players that did not perform as well as they should have. Rooney (now branded as Mister Ugly of football lol boos), Messi, Van Parsie, Kaka and Torres- all are titans in this game but simply failed which was quite heartbreaking. I have a new-found appreciation for football regardless of what all you assholes say about me only enjoying it because of the men. Yeah so what, i can't help it if they're sexy AND talented. Sue me.

Oh and i HAVE to share this before this entry ends. ANOTHER reason why i am in love with Fernando Torres.

Interview with Pepsi

"Why did you cut your hair? is it for good luck? or something?"
"Ha, to be honest. i talked with my wife and said i need to look more like a father but everyone is telling me now, i look like a kid"

AWWWWW. WHY IS HE SO ADORABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!............ok off topic. 

Alright. One last look at the boys before i close this chapter of the World Cup (ive kind of promised some people that l'll get back into my normal blogging instead of just panting over sexy men all the time. my blog has officially turned into a Torres Shrine and a compilation of perverted thoughts....about Torres and futbol haha) I'm really sad that they're all splitting up and going back to their own clubs. Sighs. But congrats to them for not only being European Champions, but now World Champs : ))))))


Can you believe it.....WORLD CUP IS OVER. ohmygawd.

Life has officially become empty and meaningless again. Sad face.

Club football anyone?!!?

Back into routine tomorrow. Beast Mode, Normal Senseless Blogging & Starbucks. Outs.

Saturday, July 10, 2010


Just spent an hour on the phone with a girlfriend, me talking mainly. Telling her why one needs to move on. Why its important to let go because it becomes unhealthy- emotionally, mentally and physically when the hope in your heart becomes your guiding tool for life instead of your mind.

I felt so effing pro yo.

If you come by and read this, love you dear. My words may be harsh but its because i don't want to see you walking in the footsteps i took oh-so-many years ago and i am genuinely concerned with how you are handling things.

At the same time, it's also a verbal reminder to myself to listen to my own words.

The irony.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Love Letter

Dear Fernando Torres,

i love you. i think im a little bit wayyy tooo in love with youuuuu.
Everything i read about you and your team makes me feel fuzzy. Your smile melts me and lets not get into your sexifying and intoxicating looks because i am already at risk of incriminating myself. Your body makes me want to do bad, bad, things with you and your talent amazes me. Despite your performance so far and all these "negative" comments regarding your ineffective beast mode, i still have faith in you my hunk and your inner bull.
I might just make it a life goal to meet you and attempt to attach myself to you.
Even if it means a little jail time. Creepy? Yes. A little. But that's because i am so utterly in love with youuuuu.

Love, Me. The Girl that is so Jealous of your Wife

Thursday, July 8, 2010

PAUL WAS RIGHT : A Futbol Post

Again. Quick warning that this is a futbol-filled post.
Skip ahead to read some footnotes i guess. lol

I think i am still in disbelief that Spain made it to the final, to duke it out with Netherlands for the World Cup this Sunday. I was seriously ready to watch them play in the losers match on Saturday and hang up my jersey when suddenly i saw their lineup and noticed that Torres was out!!?? That's when i thought omfg SPAIN HAS A CHANCE TO WIN!!!!!! Love the guy but without him, their defense was MUCH stronger and totally caught Germany off guard. The game was played exactly how Spain wanted it to be played. Pretty much the more possession they had, the harder their defense was for Germany to break through, the bigger chance they had. I was a little concern that it was going to go into OT. I think that would have been devastating and dangerous. Luckily one of Spain's veteran players heads it in to ensure a lead. I think the German lost a little momentum at that point and was discouraged a bit and wasn't able to score another one in because Spain's defense and keeper were too strong.

Side thing: I laughed my ass off when the "intruder" came running into the field in the middle of the game. AHAHHA omg what gets to me the most is the fact that hes holding a vuvuzela. As if that will help him hahaha I wonder what his purpose was. I was kind of hoping he would start dancing or start humping davi villa whom i believe was the closest to him. hahaha

I digress.

When they brought Torres back out, i was really hoping that playing against an old opponent would bring back that spark that makes oh-so-extraordinary. Back in 2008 during the FINAL between Germany and Spain for the Eurocup, Torres flew past Lahm to make the winning goal. I thought maybe going head to head with Lahm again on the pitch would bring his inner "bull" back out....heh. But no. Skip down to see why he was not given that opportunity.

Torres comforting my two fave German players, Podolski and their hot captain Phillip Lahm. What a sweetheart.

Just like that kiddos, Spain avenged for my darlings over there in ENG. teheheheh BIG SMILES.

That said though, one of the things that really pissed the fuck out of me, is what you see in the above graphic. As you can see, Torres (#9) was COMPLETELY OPEN, no Germans defender to be SEEN and the dick Pedro was too fucking selfish to see that and did not pass it but instead LOST the damn ball. If he was actually able to utilize that to his advantage then it wouldnt have been such a piss off. But the fact that he was such a ball hog whore and didnt give Torres a chance to score- makes him a big bitch. Torres seriously just needs that ONE GOAL, one fucking goal to give him back his strikers confidence and that bitch and a half totally ruined it. You can even see Torres flaring up in the graphic. He mustve been pissed as hell as i am.

Anyways. Why i think Spain will win the world cup
  1. Unity. I don't think i have ever seen a team with so much bromance on the field. hahah Not even just that. But they are honestly like brothers off the pitch when they practice, travel, eat and spend time with each other. Its absolutely adorable. Their bond is a very big advantage because of their common goal of wanting to win for the team/country and not for personal glorification. They're also a lot more in-sync with one another which allows coordination to be better. Their unity is incredible if i may say so myself.
  2. Their ability to catch up. Unlike the other teams, i find that Spain has really good momentum (good consistency) and are able to catch up if needed.
  3. Slow but Sturdy. Spain is considered the 2nd slowest team in the World Cup next to North Korea. They honestly cannot outrun a lot of the teams. That said though, they do love their passes and when they start passing and passing and passing the ball back and forth, back and forth- it wears the opponents down (which was exactly what happened in the germany game) and thats when they go for the kill.
  4. They were the EURO champs in 2008. What more can i say?
The boys definitely have taken Spain to new heights in this world cup. They have NEVER been in the finals. This itself is monumental enough. Sunday is going to be the game of a lifetime!!!! i am wearing my jersey every chance i get for the remainder of the week haha!
GO SPAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok now that's done with. A little bit about my day AS im watching the game lol. Thankfully, I was able to find people that actually took the day off to watch the game. Yes, futbol is THAT important to some of us!!!!! I was pleasantly surprised to see that many people that came out to watch it when i thought it was just going to be myself, J and S. We went to our usual bar to watch it on the big screen and did our usual 3.50 shots. After the game, for some reason we decided to bar hop and went somewhere else to drink even more. My god i was completely hammered by 6pm. It was actually really disgusting and i dont think l'll ever do something like that again hahah once is enough. Regardless though i had such a great time. What's really awesome about these guys and my cousin, is that they don't judge you no matter what you do. If i do what i do with a different bunch, iiiii don't think they'll still regard me in the same light. Also i don't know a bunch that will party harder then these guys and i loveeee that. I hope they like me. haha

Today's going to be quiet or rather i'm forced to be quiet. Currently staying in bed with a heat pad to my stomach because i have crazy crazy pains shooting at me. Today was originally gonna be a SB day with a 2 hour Combat and Pump session planned for later in the afternoon but with this- i can barely even make it to the washroom. So its just watching the game (again) and my HP book all day.

Wings with the boys tomolo! Saturday, J's bbq and watchin the losers match between Germany and Uruguay (may the cuties duke it out for 3rd place!) with K. My entire Sunday is reserved for futbol.

and then Monday means routines back into place. Can you believe it? Its already been a month and the tournament is ending!!!!!! Life is going to be so meaningless and empty.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Cookies and Futbol

2352 Bloor St. West

The other day i mustve ate the world's yummiest cookie (MY CREATION). I stumbled across this bakery called Sweet Flour (Bloor W and...Runnymede?!?!? Yeah. Don't ask what i was doing there.) and for 2.50 (!!! Actually it is rather pricey for a SB sized-cookie now that i think about it), you are able to create your own coookie!!!! You get to choose your dough (Original, Peanut Butter or Oatmeal) and then choose up to 2 (free) toppings to add to your cookie, bake for two minutes and you get a FRESHHHH-pipin'-hot-what-tastes-like-800-delicious-calories original cookie! Toppings includes the obvious- white/dark/fatty/bitter/special chocolates, peanut butter stuff, all types of nuts and dried fruits. There was a selection to choose from with about six different spreads you can put atop of the cookie. MMMMMMMM I came out with a Original, Pistachio Cookie with Salted Caramel Spread. And fak it was heavenly. Whoever came up with Salted Caramel is a bloody genius. He is right up there with the guy that invented air conditioning.

So go. If you are in the area. haha

Alright. Now its FUTBOL TIME AGAIN =D
Skip again if you wish to ignore my senseless babble

The Big Semifinal game that determines the two top giants to duke it out this coming Sunday!!! The first of two semi final games was today. Holland (Netherlands) vs Uruguay (or U-R-GAY- or UR-UGLY) and it was mad intense. Holland pulled off 3 spectacular goals (it wasnt even by fluke or anything) and Uruguay with 2, with the last goal being the most dramatic and awesome one of all 5 goals. I gotta give it to Uruguay for fighting to the end. This is what i call FIGHTING for the World Cup. None of that pansy shit that ENG demonstrated. Argh. Thinking about their lack of drive makes me so so so angry. Anyways. Netherlands to be fighting for the big bad cup this Sunday and Uruguay to fight for 3rd place aka the Losers Match as Tall J calls it. Sad face. Bright side though, i have a huge school girl crush on the Uruguay Goalie, Fernando Musler. Giggles.

Aw. Isnt he so dorky looking? His name is Fernando toooo...Giggle Giggle.
I get to see him one more time in the Saturday match!

As for the Spain and Germany game tomorrow. I am pretty much desperate and trying to convince everyone i know whos into futbol to come out to watch this serious semi-final game with me somewhere. It is going to either be a disgusting slaughter or a game of crazy LUCK (referring mainly to Spain). Personally i feel like the odds are with Germany and Spain should honestly start widening their options. Which comes to the next thing i wanted to share.

Spain's attack has a self paced feel to it with difficulties getting up tempo. They meet a German team that sets an attacking tone right from the get go. The Rojas do not want to go behind early. They need to force Germany into defensive measures early. Unfortunately, Fernando Torres's form and Vicente Del Bosque's tactic of two holding midfielders has slowed down the team to a crawl. They are the slowest of the four semi-finalists and out of the 32 teams only the North Koreans are slower. (That is so brutal and so sad)

Against Germany in Euro 2008, the blistering pace of Torres made the difference as he outclassed Philip Lahm in that footchase. Spain unfortunately cannot rely on him to provide that breakaway this World Cup.
El Nino has been a pale shadow- sadly lacking speed, strength, and touch. Without those elements, the Rojas have become a lateral passing team trying to break down defenses through the middle. The Paraguayans effectively marshaled their forces in that part of the pitch before another classical Xavi- Iniesta- Villa move unlocked the defense. But Spain had to sweat to the 83rd minute for that breakthrough.

The Germans will expect more of the same. Which is why Torres should sit on the bench. Spain can increase speed and widen its game by introducing Jesus Navas and hope the Sevilla player bears his crosses into the box. Del Bosque will go in for a 4-2-3-1. The Germans are looking for that correction too.
Del Bosque should be emboldened by doing away with one of the holding midfielders- preferably Busquets and pair up Fernando Llorente with David Villa up front with Jesus Navas out on the right flank. You create a 4-1-3-2 with a lot of speed and variation down the wings. Germany will be forced to stretch out their defense.

- Source

I am a die-heart-devoted Fernando Torres fan. But even i, believe that they really gotta bench him and freaking attack Germany. Spain has NEVER won the World Cup in all its histories and i think this would be a tremendous win for them if they're able to take home world cup and place it beside their Europcup from 08.

"El Nino has been a pale shadow- sadly lacking speed, strength, and touch" - as heartbroken as i am when i read that....its true. He's not at all aggressive, i feel like whenever he's on the pitch, he's a delicate little boy being attacked by vicious bulls coming at all directions and i fear for his legs when he falls. SOOOO. Unless my freckled face hunk is going to be so full of speed and strength that he'll be doing sumersults on the pitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's better off protecting his assets (erm legs haha) for his club as the next season approaches. I still love you though nando !!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways. I'm realllllly hoping for the best for tomorrow's game. Paul the Octopus predicted a Germany loss and i realllllllllly hope he is on his mark for this one.

& for those who don't know who Paul the Octopus is. He's a Oracle octopus that has been predicting the outcomes of all of Germany's international football matches. To date (for all their FIFA games), he has yet to be lets hope he's right on this one!!!!!!!! Coincidentally though, he DID predict a EUROCUP (08) win for Germany, in a final game between them and SPAIN but it turned out that Spain actually ended up being the winner taking home the Eurocup (thnx to my baby Torres and his goal that allowed this teehehehe) might go crazy with its oracle-like vibes whenever Spain is in the picture. WHO KNOWS.

Let's pray for a damn GOOD, game tomorrow boys and girls. i shall have my torres jersey on for spiritual support muahhahaha THNX H FOR THE GIFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D

AH yes. The end of FUTBOL. Moving on.

Ah. there really isn't anything else. A spontaneous Summerlicious dinner this friday with the boys, then bbq, and then WORLDCUP GAME. This weekend is going to be epic epic epic!!!

And as much as i complain about the weather. i effing love this humidity. =D

Monday, July 5, 2010

Such effing bullshit

Sunday, July 4, 2010

i heart spain

Source via Here

Marca has, as they did two years ago at the Eurocopa, gotten the players to write down something they promise to fulfill should Spain win the World Cup. The envelopes will be opened and the secrets revealed on July 12 only if Spain lifts the World Cup trophy.

Look at Torres. I just wanna eat him up : )))


For someone who drank almost all day yesterday with combination of the worst drinks that always kills me....i have ZERO HANGOVER TODAY.


I will be back later.

Made myself mugSS of (Christmas) Joy SB Tea with a dash of honey....even though its 37 degrees outside. Throat kills. I feel myself getting sick.

Otay I am back. And i am going to jump right into the topic of FUTBOL again.
Scroll down to skip this part.

For the Argentina vs. Germany and Paraguay vs. Spain game, i actually woke up uber early to go out to watch both games at the Real Sports Bar & Grill DT. It was completely worth it though because watching it at such an awesome, huge place thats surrounded by 200 HD LCD TVs with crazy surround sound is intense and way more exciting than at home for sure lol I spent a little way too much money but its okay because its futbol.

Wine and tea at together is just so classy.

So. What are everyone's thoughts on Argentina getting their ass raped by Germany? Holy shiet for me personally, it was like watching the ENGLAND vs Germany game all over again. PWNED. Australia vs. Germany? DOUBLE PWNED. It was so painful to watch. A part of me really wanted Germany to go down though (because i am still bitter about the England Slaughter) but i really couldn't help but jumped on the German bandwagon and cheered along when pretty much the entire bar was pro-Germans. I know, i am such a traitor lol But their jerseys are so niceeeeeeeeee.

AND AND. Since Argentina did not manage to even score ONE goal kindaaaaa makes England more superior because they at least got ONE goal in (wells. technically two but i dont want to get into that second goal made by lampard that was not called. i would only get upset). HEHE.

As for the Spain vs. Paraguay game. It was so intense, so nerve-wrecking, i needed rounds of shots to calm meself down. They NEEDED to win and thank god for Villa, Spain and i got our reassurance. I did not buy my effing jersey to be retired one day since it was bought!!!!!!!!!!! The penalty shots totally made my blood pressure soar and i screamed way too much when the game ended. Just an FYI to everyone- Spain has actually never made it past Quarter finals so winning this game was pretty much the team making history. I am blooooody proud of them!!! And as for Torres being sent off again a little bit after half-time- i don't care what anybody said. The guy is an effing fighter and i love that freckled face hunk regardless of what his performance is like.

Now for the Germany vs. Spain game on Wednesday? I want Spain to effing BRUTALIZE Germany to avenge for England. Giggles. In truth though, Spain is probably just going to get a good slaughter from Germany. For the very first time in the god-knows how many rounds they've played- i actually think Germany can take this home. They are consistent in their performance, high ambitions, highly energized, good strategies and have GREAT ball control. Damn those Germans but they can RUN like the wind too. Spain...ahhh...not so consistent with performance. Great set-ups but terrible ball control. And my baby Torres is not aggressive enough to take on that Schweinsteiger guy. hahah

My predictions are now: Germany as the big winner, Netherland coming second and Spain third (SIGHS). 


Pretty much all i did afterwards was head back uptown to continue to drink at C's Birthday BBQ. It was seriously like i mentioned earlier, drinking all day until 2am.

Good timesssss.

In a way, I'm also kind of waiting for World Cup to be over so i can normalize my routine again. I've gotten extremely side-tracked with EVERYTHING (working out, working on portfolio, side projects, driving lessons.....) all the important big girl stuff because i've put futbol first. Once its over, it would mean diving back into a more active schedule and less money spending because i've spent a disgusting amount over the past month.

That said though, anybody noticed summer zooming by? Just like that its July...then August...and then September? Times flying. Things aren't. That concerns me.

&& something i thought l'll share with all my she-readers.
Just now K showed me pics of her friends wedding (a girl whom i knew of back at Wex) and the first words that came to mind was- WOW. I did not know normal people in Toronto are capable of having such amazing fairytale, rich-looking weddings. Not to mention the bride herself is this extremely pretty girl with hair i would die for. It's honestly a Carrie Bradshaw meets Celine Dion kind of wedding. AND on top of which- the couple seems very in love. Everything about her is brutally beautiful and jealous-worthy. I need to show the cousin. lolol

A girl can only dream ~

Friday, July 2, 2010

Titan Teams: Another futbol related post

Here's an article i found that pretty much summarizes my thoughts in a professional, well-articulated way. My comments are bolded and emphasis on sentences are in italics. Only for those interested of course.

The Big Three

Back on June 9, I predicted that only three teams could win the World Cup: Argentina, Brazil or Spain. (Those are actually my picks for the pool toooooo!!!!!!!) I was right then. I'm even more correct now. (YES YES!!) The Big Three are even bigger today than they were on June 9. They look pretty invincible and should make up 75% of the semi-finalists after the quarter-finals this weekend. The only question - and it's a very difficult question indeed - is who will end up as the Big One on July 11.

After the upsets in the group stage, the first round knock-out games went very much to plan. The only real surprise was the creative sophistication of young Mesut Ozil and the fluency of the German attack -- but the truth is that even you or I would've looked quick against a shockingly pedestrian English defense. Meanwhile, a David Villa inspired Spain - in spite of a malfunctioning Fernando Torres (Pouts) and a Xavi missing his usual incisiveness - comfortably beat a toothless Ronaldo-Portugal. Argentina (HA) - with Carlos Tevez as his most troublesome best - waltzed home against a classically lightweight Mexican side. Meanwhile, Brazil made a very good Chile look quite ordinary. The momentum seems to be with Dunga's side. Even Kaka, so disappointing for Real Madrid for most of this season, is beginning to rediscover the form that made him the best player in the world a couple of years ago (I am behind you 500% my humble sexy pet).

The only real question about the quarter finals is whether the Dutch or the Germans can pull off a surprise and restore North European pride. But, in spite of their four wins, it's hard to see the disappointing Dutch being able to outwit a Brazilian side that appears to have no weaknesses. It's one thing for tireless Dirk Kuyt to successfully hussle the Slovakians or Japanese, it quite another for him to have any success against a Brazilian defense brilliantly marshaled by their captain Lucio. For the Dutch to pull off a major surprise, they'll not only need Robin Van Persie back to his best, but also something very special from Arjen Robben and Wesley Sneijder. Not impossible, but very unlikely.

Less unlikely is a Germany victory over Argentina. (I kind of disagree. I think there may be surprises) There's no doubt this is a very good German attack, capable of scoring goals against the best sides in the world. But their defense has yet to be tested. With Tevez and Messi and Higuain, not to mention Aguero and Milito on the bench, it's not hard to imagine Argentina scoring three or four times on Saturday. But Germany's best chance is an Argentina implosion or a Maradona meltdown.(LOL @ the Maradona meltdown part) This one could be a high scoring, dramatic classic. Not to be missed. (HELLS YEAHHH. I am UBER excited)

So far, this World Cup hasn't been exceptional. There's just too much of a gulf between the Big Three and the rest of the world. To make this a tournament remembered for more than its vuvuzelas and Jabulani ball (effing jabulani ball), we need to see two games between the Big Three. What I'm hoping for, therefore, is a Spain-Argentina semi-final with the winners playing Brazil in the final.(MY PICKS!!) Rather than giant-killing, what this World Cup desperately needs is some games between giants.




Originally today i was planning on spending the entire day cleaning up and organizing my clothes. The plan was for me to get up, head out to Starbucks to buy myself two Starbucks (Yesh. Two, not one. I need it for the entire day), then watch True Blood, Hells Kitchen and TVB Dramas to get myself through the day. I'm not allowed to listen to music because music provokes emotion and not allowed to watch fireworks because that too, provokes emotions.

But everything go went wrongggggggg.

I did not have the metro pass to go do my SB run and i didnt want to waste 6 bucks of tokens to do the run. My bandwidth did not support me to do all my downloads thus nothing to watch and there is something seriously wrong with the speakers on my laptop so i couldn't watch anything with Duo-Audio (refer to older TVB dramas ive downloaded before). Argh argh. I ended up doing literally nothing but sleep. Watched two episodes of Sex and the City but stopped when it got a little bit personal lol Then i got really emo and began binging on icecream and roast pork in the kitchen. Argh argh fail fail fail!!!I didn't want to text or call anyone because i did not want to burden or annoy anyone so i chose to be quiet today. I'm sure though, once those that reads this in the next little bit l'll get an earfull about why i didn't call them.

That said my room is still messy with clothes SHOVED at every corner of my room. I keep on wearing the same thing over and over again because its accessible since its right on my bed. Also the door to my closet is maddd screwed up so i can't even open it properly. I need a wardrobe and gotta stop procrastinating. I'm starting to accumulate so much clothes that im actually starting to forget that i own some stuff and that maybe i should start wearing them again......this is a sign that i need to stop shopping.

I guess its not as baddddd as it seems but i still really hate being disorganized. I also need to get back into the reno project that's been ongoing for a year. sighs.

Bright side though- I made it through the day though as its officially 12am as i type this. *Pat on back*

: )


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